|
Shelley C. Wilson, MFT |
(949) 922-7800
"It is not about trying harder."
|
|
Scooter embraces the Zen of Boomer |
|
|
Stuff That I Want to Share
My recommendations are to spread the word about stuff that I think is meaningful, helpful, enjoyable or interesting.
Season 4 of Mad Men just premiered on July 25th. I consider the series to be "television art." It brilliantly and somewhat painfully portrays our American culture and relationships at that moment in the 1960's. It is thought-provoking to witness with our current adult selves, those beliefs, attitudes and ways of living because it was not that long ago. This was our parents' or grandparents' world and multigenerational influences are powerful and long-lasting. For example, the gender roles depicted in Mad Men were in my family home with my parents. Who I am as a woman in 2010 is partly a reaction to who my mother was as a woman in the 1960's. Someone said to me: "It was easier then. People knew the rules and roles." What is your reaction?
Mad Men brings many of our influencers to consciousness. It shows us how far we have come and where we may be the same. It may stimulate and challenge your thinking while you wonder about Don Draper. Isn't that one of the purposes of art?
|
|
|
|
My brain could take a vacation.
I love writing about my interests, thoughts, follies and fancies but I want to be sensitive to my dear readers. It is likely that my overactive brain will continue to generate ideas but if there is some topic that you would like addressed, please let me know. You can email shelley@shelleywilson.com
|
|
The Waiting Game
"Whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should..." - Max Ehrmann
It feels like I have been waiting for quite awhile now... waiting for some shifts, some changes, some opportunities, some guidance, some blossoming in my life. Frankly, I can get a little (alot?) cranky while I am waiting for something to change.
I may be making this up in my head but I think that lots of people feel the same way right now. My hypothesis is that our country's economic struggles are a reflection of the birth - death - rebirth cycle that I talk about with my clients. Life, our ways of being, and our psyches seem to be experiencing the death portion of this cycle on both a large and small scale. These death episodes are painful and hard and filled with loss. But now it feels like the deaths and losses may be slowing and lessening and we may be emerging into rebirth; change is in the air even if we can't see it all yet. Things are going to happen but they have not arrived yet. Don't you want it to happen already? Me too!
So we may be in a period of waiting and I do know that you cannot rush waiting. Life is going to happen at its own time and its own pace. What is the waiting game like for you?
As I mentioned, waiting can irritate me. My inner tyrant snaps: "I want what I want when I want it and I should be able to make that happen now." Whew! As with many life lessons, my dogs have much to teach me about waiting. I am owned by a yellow Lab named "Boomer" and a Jack Russell terrier named "Scooter." Both of them hold the steadfast belief that they should be inside the house with their people at all times. Some times they do not get what they want (imagine that!) and have to be in the back yard. Their agenda is then to get back inside their home as soon as possible. This is their desired change.
First of all, both of them do the necessary "footwork"; they take what action they can to facilitate the change that they want. They have not figured out how to open the door so this consists of locating themselves on the porch by the most likely door to open and let them into the house. They insure that they are in their people's line of sight. They are in the right place; now they just have to wait for the right time.
Boomer and Scooter handle the waiting game in totally different ways. Scooter stays right by the door. She barks, yips and yelps; she jumps up and down like she has springs in her paws. She changes strategies and whines while looking pathetic. She remains agitated the entire time that she is waiting and vividly portrays a doggy nervous breakdown. Despite all her frenzied antics, the door does not open any sooner.
Boomer, on the other hand, is at peace. He is by the door. He has done what he can and the door has always opened for him in the past. He enjoys the wait - he naps; he lolls in the breeze; he may snap at a passing insect; he watches the lizard on the porch rail. He enjoys his life as a dog while he waits. He is at peace while Scooter acts out. Boomer has faith that the shift will happen - the door will open. It does not stay shut forever. He trusts the process so he enjoys his moments in the present during the waiting period.
Who do you want to be? Boomer or Scooter? Even though my natural temperament may more closely resemble my terrier's, I aim to live with the attitude of a Labrador Retriever. I call it the "Zen of Boomer." The waiting game is more pleasant when you take the necessary steps to be ready for the desired change and then have faith that the right result will occur at its own time and its own pace. Enjoy what is available to you in the present even as you wait. It is how you win the waiting game.
|
|
People handle waiting in varied ways but the period before something new appears can generate despair and anxiety. It can also be hard to distinguish between appropriate action to set up the change and "spinning your wheels" or being overly responsible. Please let me know if you or someone you know wants some help with this process. I would love to facilitate a "win" of the waiting game.
I do have openings in my practice so don't miss the opportunity. |
|
|
Take good care,
Shelley
Shelley C. Wilson
phone:(949) 922-7800
|
|
Unless otherwise attributed, all material is written and edited by Shelley Wilson. Copyright 2010 Shelley C. Wilson.
You may reprint material from this newsletter in other electronic or print publications provided the above copyright notice and a link to http://www.shelleywilson.com is included in the credits. |
|
|
