Most of us have felt rejection from someone, often more than once.  As children, we learn how to best deal with this rejection with help from our parents, older siblings or other people we trust.  If we have never been taught how to deal with rejection, or have been taught to deal with rejection in a destructive manner, then we will carry this with us into adulthood.

Each of us has within an inner child which requires unconditional love to grow and mature.  Essentially, when we love ourselves unconditionally, we are enabling that growth and maturity of our inner child. Conversely, if we don't love ourselves unconditionally, our inner child's growth is stunted.

We always have opportunities to love ourselves unconditionally, and rejection in any form is another opportunity to do that.  If we have never been taught to love ourselves during those times when we were rejected from someone we loved, then our inner child will act out in irresponsible and inappropriate ways.  We will become demanding, selfish, hateful, and revengeful towards those who have rejected us. 

This can make for very unhealthy and possibly destructive relationship break-ups.  One whose inner child's growth is stunted will do whatever they can to get back at the other person.  A person with an immature inner child on the receiving end of a divorce may fight long and hard.  I have witnessed many clients go through very long and drawn out court battles because their immature ex-spouse wants revenge and their ex-spouses lawyer will happily go along with that. Inside the ex-spouse is hurting deeply but they don't have the capability to heal from it because they have never learned to handle rejection properly. 

The most important thing you can do if you are the person initiating a divorce or break-up with a partner like this is to not feel guilty about moving on.  You are right in your desire for a relationship that aligns with your inner child's maturity level.   You have done nothing wrong by growing and maturing and it is not your fault - nor your responsibility - that your partner isn't.  It is normal to feel sad about an ending but it is not okay to feel guilty or shameful about it.  We are meant to grow and sometimes that means we outgrow relationships. If there is any guilt or shame on your part, your energy will be drained by your ex-partner.  If, however, you are strong and firm about your right to have an aligned relationship, you are energetically protected. 

The most important thing you can do if you have been rejected is to heal and nurture your inner child.  Love yourself unconditionally in this situation and at all times.  Practice loving yourself daily - even several times a day - and seek assistance to heal you at this core level.  It is the most important and beneficial thing you can do for yourself during this time.

Forgive yourself and love yourself unconditionally whether you are the rejected or the one doing the rejecting.  If you are the one rejected and you are reading this, then chances are you are looking for help in growing and maturing your inner child - which is great!  Help is available to you and you WILL heal from this and emerge greater from this rejection than you ever imagined.  If you are the one doing the rejecting, help is also available for you to not feel guilty about moving on and you too will emerge ever greater!