One of the things that makes "falling forward" so difficult is the reality of conflicting emotions. Madeleine L'Engle wrote a simple poem that captures this marvelously. Her words are directed toward God, but I think they apply just as well to anyone with whom we have a relationship of love:
Dear God,
I hate you.
Love, Madeleine.
Have you ever experienced this frustrating reality of being disappointed with someone while at the same time knowing that you love them dearly?
L'Engle is honest about her frustration with God, yet the last two words make all the difference - even though she is exasperated with her Creator, she is pledged to move toward him. "Love, Madeleine" becomes the denominator that defines the numerator. No matter what the exasperation is about, no matter how intense the frustration, Madeleine's relationship with God is marked by that foundational love. That's how it should be with our marriages.
Even in moments of anger, betrayal, exasperation, and hurt, we are called to pursue this person, to embrace them, and to grow toward them, to let our love redefine our feelings of disinterest, frustration, and even hate.
Content taken directly from Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas, published by Zondervan Publishing, copyright 2000.
