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Start With Their Needs
by Dr. Gary Chapman
Some have called "spiritual intimacy" the illusive dream.
Why do some spouses have trouble talking about spiritual things? Often it is feelings of inferiority.
Perhaps the spouse has been a Christian much longer than they, and the younger Christian feels intimidated. But more often, it comes from unmet emotional or physical needs.
If we have not developed some level of emotional and sexual intimacy, it may be extremely difficult to talk about spiritual things.
The sense of emptiness or rejection in these areas may be so intense that in the mind of one or both of the spouses, talking about spiritual things may be seen as mere pretense.
If spiritual intimacy seems illusive to you, examine the other areas of your marriage. Perhaps the place to start is not with the spiritual, but with the emotional, social, or sexual.
You will certainly need God's help to do this. So, develop your own spiritual life and ask God to empower you be the husband or wife your spouse needs.
When your spouse feels genuinely cared for in these areas, you may find much more openness to spiritual matters.
Article written by Dr. Gary Chapman. Based on the book, Now You're Speaking My Language by Dr. Gary Chapman. Published by Moody Publishing. For a complete listing of Dr. Chapman's books and resources, click here.
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