Many of our clients find they can rein in their own expenses but when it comes to their kids, they turn into marshmallow moms. And so it was a real test for one of our clients when her 17-year-old daughter wanted to go on a school trip. Not your average day trip, this was a 12-day expedition that was going to give her an opportunity to live in another culture, learn a language and volunteer to help kids in another country.
All laudable goals. And all adding up to $3,000.
It was money that just hadn't been figured into this family's budget so this was a dilemma. The solution we came up with? A combination of student summer earnings, a small parental contribution and an IOU from the student to her parents for a loan to be paid off from a part-time job.
"If I think she is ready to make sacrifices to go on this trip, I'd be inclined to do the same," the client told us. "However if it's just that she'll go if we do all the heavy financial lifting, maybe not."
The teen traveller was ready to make the sacrifices, the trip went off without a hitch and any worries our client had about being too Scrooge-like with her daughter disappeared when an older sibling weighed in, she later told us.
"My son and I were talking about it and he allowed that he might be more fiscally responsible if we had pushed such responsibilities onto him instead of letting him duck them," said the client.
So if you're beginning to think your teen regards your wallet as a cash machine, the start of a school year might be a good time to change that.
Check out our tips for teaching your teen financial responsibility. And set a good example by getting your own finances in order with our upcoming 10 Steps to Better Finances workshop. Sign up on our web site for the October 20th workshop and take advantage of our 'bring a friend for free' special to bring your daughter.
8 Tips To Teach Your Teens About Good Money Management.
- Give them an allowance. It's okay if they make mistakes in their spending decisions; it's how they learn.
- Give them financial responsibilities. What expenses are they expected to cover with their allowance? Bus fare, lunch money, clothes, cell phone, movies, slurpees?
- Talk to them about money. You can't learn anything new if you never talk about it.
- Involve them in some of the decisions over family finances. Give them a choice or hold a family vote. Should we buy a new TV or go on holiday? Do you want to play hockey at $600 a year or take weekly guitar lessons?
- Encourage them to save for things they really want or insist they pay half. (A trip with the school, a must-have pair of $200 jeans, spending money for your family holiday)
- Don't get your teens hooked on credit. That means not continually shelling out money in return for half-hearted promises to pay it back.
- Don't let them off the hook. If you do agree to advance them money clearly set out the terms and stick to them!
- It's okay to say no. They will thank you for it later (OK much later, but they will thank you one day).
