Greetings! How did you spend your Memorial Day? Today we remember and pay tribute to our nation's fallen heroes. (There is a great op-ed piece that appeared in the NY TImes over the weekend written by David Blight - a distinguished professor of history at Yale University - see below for the link).The holiday officially became known as Memorial Day by an act of Congress in 1968. It was originally known as Decoration Day, and by some accounts it was founded by African Americans, who, as freed slaves, decorated the graves of fallen Union Soldiers. For some in the South, the ritual was a means for healing and reconciliation of a fractured nation, while others rallied as a cause for further hatred and for white supremacy. Like most things in life, the meaning of what we embrace is founded in our personal beliefs - and there is not always one single truth that we all embrace. 
In this regard, the Holiday and it's meaning is in many ways like the conversations we have with the people in our lives. How often have you felt that you expressed yourself perfectly clearly only to then realize that the person you shared your words with thought you said something entirely different? We embrace our own personal truths and feel certain we clearly express our beliefs through what we say, yet it is obvious that what was heard is always more relevant than what was said. Susan Scott, a former Vistage Chair and speaker wrote a book Fierce Conversation. It's one of the "bibles" of Chair training. In the book she notes that "all Conversations are with myself, and sometimes they involve other people." As leaders we all need to remember this and seek to find common meaning with the people we lead. (Please read about Fierce Conversations below.) S0, what did you do on this Memorial Day? Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, "What you do speaks so loudly I can't hear what you say." It is our actions that define us, and our decisions that define our actions. Perhaps it was a day spent with friends and family, celebrating our freedom to usher in the lazy, gentler days of summer. For the people of Joplin and other areas ravaged by recent storms and forces of nature - the notion of nature offering a gentle season is perhaps better appreciated than by most. Or maybe you took time to reflect on the patriotic remembrances of the holiday, and made time to express gratitude for the supreme sacrifices young men and women have made on behalf of our great nation or took in a local parade. Perhaps you have family members who lost their lives at war - and in some personal way you honored them. Whatever you did today, remember you chose to do it. As CEOs making decisions is essence of your job. And it is the quality of the decisions you make that will determine the boundaries of your company. I frequently remind the CEOs that I work with that one of the great privileges and sometimes burdens of sitting in the catbird seat - is that we do have the power to decide what we do, when we do it and with whom we spend our time. If there is something about our company - or our life - we are dissatisfied with, we have more power and ability than most people to change things. Yet many, instead allow themselves to feel trapped, or even paralyzed by their circumstances. Sometimes are decision-making abilities are crippled by what Larry Wilson describes in his book, Play to Win as the four fatal fears: - the fear of failure,
- the fear of being wrong,
- the fear of rejection or
- the fear of being emotionally uncomfortable.
These are natural tendencies that get in the way of our ability to make clear decisions. Or perhaps you are suffering from a limiting belief about yourself or the world that filter and even distort your reality. These are the tape-loops in our heads, usually in reaction to past experience that we repeat over and over that control our behavior - but my have no basis in your current reality. They form the traps that hold us back from making good decisions. One of my Vistage Colleagues this week sent me a link to two-minute video titled "Lost Generation" by Jonathan Reed. I first saw this about a year ago - and it left a lasting impression. It's a great reminder of how your priorities shape the meaning of your life. View "Lost Generation" Here: http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=42E2fAWM6rA Memorial Day is also the official kick-off of summer. It's a good time to think about balance in our lives. It's time to spend with friends and family - and focus on life beyond business. Great leaders recognize that their value as a leader can also be measured by how much they value their family and friends and those we touch - including the people who work for us. Without them, success in whatever we achieve often seems hollow and unsatisfying. While thinking about taking some time and honoring those who have given their lives to protect our freedom and way of life, it would also be a good idea to think about the people in your life and in your company who should also be honored for their contributions. Great leaders understand that without the achievements and success of those we lead, our efforts are marginalized, and that our value and our personal success comes from their success. To build a durable, sustainable success in any organization, the surest way is to give credit and express appreciation often and whenever it is due. While thinking appreciation, success and summer- all things that should make us smile - I came across an interesting video on TED.com that reveals some surprising insights on smiling - and how this contagious and often spontaneous inflection of muscles and wired to our emotions can be a predictor of who long we will live - and can have a measurable effect on your overall well being. Take a few minutes and watch Ron Gutman explain the Hidden Power of Smiling... http://www.ted.com/talks/ron_gutman_the_hidden_power_of_smiling.html Whatever you did today - and whatever you do... As always, wishing you a great and successful week ahead. 
Philip R. Liebman Managing Director, Strat4 Group Chair, Vistage International | 
Fierce Conversations - Achieving Success at Work and in Life, One Conversation at a Time