j Tea Time with Berta
Why is it so hard? Good question. Why do we spend approximately 60 billion dollars per year trying to lose weight? Between the diet books and videos, diet soda and low-cal frozen entrees, gym memberships and personal trainers we should be the thinnest nation in the world. Au contraire. Americans are actually the fattest and most unhealthy people in the world! It blows my mind to think about it. What's wrong? What's the answer? Can it really be so complicated? Many years ago I went to a psychic with many burning questions (eye rollers, desist! Everyone should have a good psychic for those times when the path not taken looms large). It sounds ridiculous, today, but the very first thing I asked, Will I ever be free from worry about my weight? made her laugh uproariously as she replied in the affirmative. I wanted more answers, of course. How? When? What will I weigh? But a big fat Yes! was all she would give me. Today, I can see why she thought it was so funny, and I wish she had let me in on it at the time, but she knew I needed to find my own way on this journey and that asking her for direction was not going to serve my learning. The problem with asking for help is that you mightlook to the wrong "people." Too many experts point you in the wrong direction, down the wrong road. How do I know their roads are wrong? Well, that's simple: their roads don't end, they take you in circles. You count points, you lose points, you weigh food, your weight goes up, you read labels, you label yourself, and in the end, you start over, hoping this time it will work, all the while wondering how you will ever manage to maintain it if you are lucky enough to get to the end of the road. I get a headache just writing about it! A woman once told me that she had been doing Weight Watchers for 20 years and planned to stay on the program forever. She acknowledged that she had never been less than 40 pounds from her goal weight, but she credited the program with keeping her from becoming much larger. Appalled, I could not believe that she had subjected herself to 20 years of restriction, had never come even close to the desired result and planned to continue ad infinitum! Personally, I don't think that is living. Even if I could sustain such a lifestyle, I wouldn't want to! I don't want to think about points and calories for all eternity. I want a body that works for me, one that I deserve. I want the peace of mind that comes with knowing that one indulgent meal will not result in my getting fat! While we all know that reaching a goal can be hard at times, I can tell you with total sincerity that it does not take 20 years with no possibility of parole. And...do you really need to be locked up so you won't commit murder? The simple truth is this: there's nothing you get on that you don't get off. So, if you're on a diet, you're bound to be off a diet. Then what? Well, you go on and off another one. I'm tired of this. I'm tired of seeing how tired you are, as well. I'm tired of hearing the perpetual lies about what we need to do or take or spend in order to lose 40 pounds in 10 days! Many of you have heard my thoughts on the "reality" show The Biggest Loser. I hold the show in contempt because its message messes with the minds of millions of overweight Americans. The behaviors that are encouraged on that show are neither healthy nor sustainable. When I see the herculean efforts the contestants must put forth in order to lose and keep off the weight after the show, it makes me angry for all of the women watching. Why? It makes women (men are different) feel like they are the biggest losers because they cannot simply starve, exercise like it's their job (as it is for the contestants) and maintain an unnatural weight loss brought about by artificial and unhealthy practices. I remember coming home 30 years ago having signed on the dotted line for the ultra trendy, and even more expensive, Eat Butter and Lose diet plan. Are you serious? asked my brother.Why don't you just stop eating as much and go for a jog every day? Even then what he said made sense. Of course he was right, but something inside told me it was more complicated than simply expending more than I consumed. Obviously, back then I didn't realize that it isn't all about the food. Of course I now know, as you do, that we did not all gain lots of weight due to many years excessive hunger. And your difficulties with losing it are not rooted in the fact that you are weak and lack self-control, either! Look at all of the outlandish diets you have tried in the past! They were impossible to sustain, but sustain them you did, and so did I. So why do we find it impossible to follow a fundamentally healthy plan of eating delicious, colorful whole foods in moderation? Why were we able commit to practically brushing our teeth with bacon and "treating" ourselves to a nice snack of pork rinds-for months on end-when today we find it hard to enjoy a beautiful tray of crudités at a backyard barbecue? Oh, and by the way, I dare you to research pork rind and not experience retroactive vomiting when you learn what it was you were eating. Speaking from experience, back in the day when I wanted to lose 10 pounds, I wanted to lose it that week! And I wanted to lose the next 10 the following week! The more outrageous my goal, the more I was willing to accept the fact that an outrageous end demanded an outrageous means. If the book had said to eat the bacon raw, raw it would have been! By training ourselves to eat insanely, and by sustaining the insanity over the years, we have lost touch with the reality of what is and is not food. By now, we have forgotten how to enjoy real food-whole foods, foods that are not injected, infected, saturated, salted or fried! The weight loss industry's chemically altered "foods" that now pose as weight-loss aids have created a nation of addicts who can't get enough of the drug-laced, sugar-infused stuff. All of these "health" "foods," marketed to the uninitiated will never help you lose weight because they are chemically designed to nurture an addiction to them. Combine these new physical addictions with your old emotional imbalances, and the inventors of "food" have insured your continued patronage for many years to come. Let's think for a moment about why we use these food replacements. Well, they mimic the flavor or crunch of real foods that are also not good for us. We crave the brownie power bar in place of the brownie and expect that by making the sacrifice and substitution there will be an astounding weight-loss reward. When that doesn't happen, we feel cheated! Only one pound down? Ah, the brownie aside, we have forgotten that losing one to two pounds every week is aggressive weight loss! At that rate, a consistent and healthy food plan will have you losing four to eight pounds every month. Do the math and think about where you'll be by months two and three. When is the last time you lost 32 pounds in three months and knew that you not only could continue to lose, but that when you were done losing, you would be able to maintain it? Oh, and when was the last time you saw your weight going down and your state of health improving at a remarkable pace? This is what I want for you, what I know is possible, and the reason I write week after week. I want to help you take back your life and your body. It is possible, and with some direction down the right path and a little bit of help and support, you can do it. Stop thinking that you know the way. Switching on and off diets does not work. Stop thinking about the next quick fix! In fact, how about taking time today to appreciate where you. Try to understand that you can choose to make today the last time you will be where you are. Regardless of how slowly or quickly you leave where you are today to attain your goal, all you need to do is eat consistently and understand the emotional aspects that sometimes give you problems. Don't think about the end date; simply place yourself in the now. As I've said many times in the past, the moment you choose to start on this path is the moment you arrive at your goal; the rest is just a matter of time. Are you with me? Great, then scroll down to the end of this page to the the "Get Started" portion of this newsletter to make it easier to follow. If you haven't yet listened to the audio, please take the time to do so. This is easier than we are all making it! I am not minimizing your struggles, but when we remove all the drama and hoopla, it leaves just you and your steady, regular days. On one of those days you will wonder, as I once did, How did this happen? Why was I trying so hard when all the time it was right here, waiting for me to simply take it? When you know the way, it's simple. I know the way. This is the way. (link- get started) |
