Speaking is Sexy
Volume III, No. 3                                                                      January 2012

"Empty pockets never held anyone back. 
Only empty heads and empty hearts can do that."

                                            ~ Norman Vincent Peale   
          
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Included In This Issue
What's Marion Up To Now?
Have you downloaded your FREE report yet?
Speaking Is Sexy Tip #3, Vol. 3, Knocking Out Those Knock-Out Nerves
Is 2012 the year for you?!
What Do My Readers Say?
Food for Thought
More about Marion Claire ~ Revealing an Embarrassing Secret
Why is it called Speaking is Sexy? 
When what someone says and how they say it sends chills up and down your spine, that's sexy! 
 
Whether you're giving a speech, having a conversation, saying your wedding vows, teaching your kids, exhorting your sales team, or talking in your sleep, if someone is listening, you are inspiring them.  It's important to remember that whenever you speak, someone is influenced by each word you say. 
 
Be a positive influence.  Be an inspiration.  That's very sexy.
 

Did you miss a previous Speaking Tip?

You can find them here!
 
If you are...
  • Currently speaking in public,
  • Thinking of speaking in public, but procrastinating like crazy,
  • Afraid to speak in public,
  • Envious of people who speak confidently in public, or
  • Would just like a few tips on how you can speak better than they do...
This newsletter will give you tips and techniques to become the accomplished speaker you've always longed to be.

MARION CLAIRE coaches solopreneurs, business owners, middle managers and executives who want to become calm, confident, unique and sexy speakers who influence and inspire others with the power of their voice. www.marionclaire.com

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What's Marion Up To Now?     

       You're Invited!

 

      I'll be the featured guest at the LA Jewish Chamber of Commerce Monthly Business Luncheon on Tuesday, January 10, 2012, speaking on "How to Become a Unique and Sexy Speaker" to grow your business and your bottom line in the new year. If you're in the Los Angeles area and would like to come and join me, please click here to sign up.

 

Hope to see you there! I'll be delighted to meet you!

HAVE YOU DOWNLOADED YOUR FREE REPORT YET?     

 

Go to www.marionclaire.com and on the Home page, you will find a link to download this valuable speaking tool:

 

5 MAGIC KEYS TO CREATING ANY SPEECH!

 

Knowing the answers to these Five Questions will enable you to create a fabulous speech for almost any occasion.  Download your Free Report now and make creating your next speech so much easier! 

   Speaking Is Sexy Tip #3, Vol. 3  

 

Knocking Out Those Knock-Out Nerves

    

      "It's not giving the speech that terrifies me," said a colleague recently. "It's all that anxiety that paralyzes me beforehand. I feel fine once I start to talk and more confident as I go along. It's just in the moments, days or weeks before, when I'm planning and preparing, that I feel so sick to my stomach I wonder how I'll ever get through it!"conftable

       He's not the first or only speaker I've encountered who suffers from knock-out nerves before giving a speech. Pre-speech anxiety comes in many forms: procrastination, sleeplessness, forgetfulness, irritability, emotional lack of control, abnormal physical pains, unusual appetite or refusal to eat at all... these are just some of the most common symptoms. All of these might be due to many other causes besides having to give a speech, but they're very well known to many speakers at all levels of experience, from the tentative beginner to the seasoned pro. What is it about getting up in front of a bunch of strangers that makes us feel so scared? And what can we do to prevent it?

 

      All speakers feel nervous before beginning to speak for their own personal reasons. Yours are different from mine and from everyone else's on the planet. Some of them have to do with how we feel about ourselves, our confidence in our own abilities, our feelings of self-worth and acceptance in the world, how competent and capable we are, whether or not we feel prepared and knowledgeable, whether we'll be listened to and taken seriously, whether we feel appreciated and admired, etc. You can probably come up with your own additions to this list. It's important to remember that, whether this is your first speech or your 50th, all speakers suffer from similar feelings to some degree every time they speak. The difference is how they've learned to handle them.

 

      Here are a few recommendations to help you overcome pre-performance anxiety and feel a lot more comfortable about giving your next speech:

 

      1) Know your material. When you're absolutely confident about your subject and how you wish to present it, you'll feel much less anxiety about presenting it to your audience. Plan ahead. Visualize any questions you might be asked and have an answer prepared for them. Believe strongly in the value of your topic. What you have to say is important. It matters! Your goal is to communicate this belief with enthusiasm, to make your message land. If you believe that what you're saying is worth listening to, your audience will, too. You'll be so busy expressing your passionate belief, you'll never think about being nervous.

 

      2) Focus on making your message land. If you're busy thinking about how you feel, how you look, whether or not you're going to stutter, stumble, or forget what to say, of course you'll be nervous! Who wouldn't be? It's not your job to concentrate on all your shortcomings! You're there to give the audience a gift, the gift of your knowledge. You've worked hard to make your speech as good as you can. Now your job is to focus on getting your message across, making it land. In other words, your job is to focus on your audience, not on yourself! It's not about you. It's about them! Keep that in the forefront of your mind when you're planning, preparing, rehearsing, and giving your speech. It's not about you. It's about giving your gift! It's all about them! When you're focusing on them, you won't have time to think about yourself and you won't be nervous.

 

      3) Use confidence-building techniques. It's normal to have pre-speech jitters. To a certain degree they can be helpful. They're a sign that your adrenaline is flowing, you're on your toes, you're highly functioning, all your instincts are 'go'. However, sometimes all that adrenaline feels a little overwhelming, in which case many speakers employ favorite techniques that make them feel calm, cool, confident and competent. One such technique is to take a few deep breaths just before you speak and say to yourself your favorite confidence-giving mantra.

       

      conftableMine is, "Okay, Marion, permit yourself to be delightful!" It makes me smile and feel good about myself. A couple of others I've heard are, "I am unique! What I have to say is important! No one can say it like me!" Or, "I am the best (insert your name here) that there could ever be! I have a special gift to give this audience!" Create your own, the one that makes you feel powerful and ready to give your gift.

 

Want to know more about knocking out the pre-speech jitters? There are many more techniques that may be helpful. Just ask. I'll be happy to talk about them with you. Contact me at Marion@marionclaire.com. 


DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS OR COLLEAGUES who would benefit from seeing this Speaking Is Sexy eZine?  Please forward it to them or send me their email address and I'll send them a copy and tell them it's from you!  www.marionclaire.com 
Want to use this Speaking Is Sexy Tip in your Newsletter or Blog?  
You can, as long as you include this entire blurb:  For fourteen years, Marion Claire has coached entrepreneurs, executives, and professionals of all kinds to become the confident, sexy speakers they longed to be.  She'll also help you write your speeches for almost any occasion.  For more information about Marion and her programs, check out her website at www.marionclaire.com 

Is 2012 the year you'll become the
Unique and Sexy Public Speaker you've always wanted to be?



     It's easier than you think to overcome your nervousness and increase your confidence.You don't need to be reluctant to get up to speak ever again. Amaze yourself at how quickly you can get rid of whatever is holding you back! Give yourself a break! Let me help you become the speaker you'd really like to be!  

 

      Do you need a quick polish on your present speaking skills? Let me show you some useful techniques that will give you more confidence and help you speak like a pro.

 

      Are you planning a major speech for an important occasion and want guidance on writing and delivering it? In a very short time, you can learn how to organize your thoughts, create a winning presentation, and speak from your heart with authority and enthusiasm.

 

      Does the thought of giving a speech absolutely paralyze you? I can help you overcome those debilitating fears using a special process that focuses specifically on getting rid of the limiting beliefs that keep you from speaking with confidence and joy. Quickly eliminate any fears that have been holding you back. At the same time, acquire tips and techniques to enable you to be calm, confident, unique and sexy every time you speak!  

 

      Give yourself a gift that will last a lifetime. Talk to me confidentially about your special speaking needs. I'm always available for a *free* half-hour consultation at 310/659-8956 or email me at Marion@marionclaire.com

What Do My Readers Say? 

 

Vol. III, #2 Happy New Year in 30 Seconds or Less! 

 

I look forward to reading your 'Speaking is Sexy' newsletter, which always has some unique, thoughtful and important information that will help me in both my business and personal life.  You have great insight, wisdom and practical tips to help guide me in my many speaking opportunities and coaching experiences.  Thank you, Marion!

 

         ~Mary Berney, MSW, Executive Coach/DISC Trainer

 

 

"Each month I read the tips in Speaking is Sexy and it helps me refresh my skills. As a lawyer, I need to be able to feel comfortable in giving speeches and the tips in the newsletter have continued to help me. Thank you Speaking is Sexy!"  

 

~Sharon Kopman, Attorney at Law  

 

How Can I Help You?  Let Me Know! 

 

Would you like to comment on what you've seen here?  Your feedback means a great deal to me.  Contact me at

Marion@marionclaire.com

Did you miss previous Speaking Tips?  You can find them at

www.marionclaire.com/newsletter

conftableFood for Thought

 

You gain strength, experience and confidence by every experience where you really stop to look fear in the face.  You must do the thing you cannot do. 

                                 ~Eleanor Roosevelt 

More about Marion Claire

 

Revealing an Embarrassing Secret   

 

      We all have an embarrassing secret that we don't want to reveal because we're afraid people will think less of us if we do so. For many, many years I hid mine. I was sure that people would look at me strangely or not want to be around me if they knew I was less than perfect.  

      Boy, was I wrong!

      The thing about hiding the truth about yourself is that you are depriving yourself and the folks you come in contact with of the opportunity to have an honest relationship with you. True, you don't want to just blurt out your deepest feelings or most painful memories at inappropriate moments. You want to be sure your revelations will be received with kindness, consideration and sympathy, and not with distaste, anger or ridicule.

      But it is far better to be open about the things you cannot change that have shaped who you are. Facing the secrets of the past helps you understand yourself and it helps others understand you. And with understanding come the gifts of appreciation, sympathy, empathy, and love.

 

      So here's the embarrassing secret I used to be afraid to reveal.

      For over 20 years, I suffered from agoraphobia, the fear of crossing open spaces. Sometimes I couldn't leave my house for more than five minutes, without scurrying back inside.

      My enemy was not the great outdoors. It was simply fear.

      Everyone experiences fear on occasion. And everyone's fear is a little bit different, personal to the individual. Mine was fear of being alone out in the world. I didn't feel safe by myself. Although I was perfectly content to live on my own, I needed the comfort and companionship of someone I knew well whenever I ventured out of the safety of my home. No way could I dream of getting up to speak in front of a room full of strangers!

      I'm so proud to say that I overcame my fear. It took, first of all, the courage to admit there was something wrong. Then came the desire to fix it and to seek out the help I needed to overcome it.

      And wow! Look at me now!

      Today I speak in front of groups of all sizes, shapes and interests. If I can do it, so can you! Let me help you. Contact me at   Marion@marionclaire.com.   

Speak Your Mind with Marion Claire

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