Speaking is Sexy
Volume I, No. 24                                                                       October 2010

"Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt."
                                                                                             ~William Shakespeare    

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Included In This Issue
Speaking Is Sexy Tip #24
Would you like to be a Sexy Speaker?
How Can I Help You?
Let a Sexy Speaker Brighten your Next Event!
Marion Recommends...
More about Marion Claire
Why is it called Speaking is Sexy? 
When what someone says and how they say it sends chills up and down your spine, that's sexy! 
 
Whether you're giving a speech, having a conversation, saying your wedding vows, teaching your kids, exhorting your sales team, or talking in your sleep, if someone is listening, you are inspiring them.  It's important to remember that whenever you speak, someone is influenced by each word you say. 
 
Be a positive influence.  Be an inspiration.  That's very sexy.
 

Did you miss a previous Speaking Tip?

You can find them here!
 
If you are...
  • Currently speaking in public,
  • Thinking of speaking in public, but procrastinating like crazy,
  • Afraid to speak in public,
  • Envious of people who speak confidently in public, or
  • Would just like a few tips on how you can speak better than they do...
This newsletter will give you tips and techniques to become the accomplished speaker you've always longed to be.

MARION CLAIRE coaches solopreneurs, business owners, managers and professionals who want to become calm, confident, sexy speakers who influence others and attract what they love with the power of their voice. www.marionclaire.com

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Speaking Is Sexy Tip #24

What Will The Audience Think?

      "I often get asked to speak in front of groups," a coaching colleague said to me recently, "but I just can't do it.  I'm not afraid exactly.  I know how to put a talk together.  I have something important to say that they really need to hear, but when it comes right down to it..." she paused and bit her lip.
      "What?" I asked.  "What is it that's stopping you?"
      She hung her head and her voice got very quiet. 
      "I'm afraid the audience won't think I'm good enough."
      "Why?"  I asked gently.
      "I don't know," she said.  "But I do."

      Sound familiar?  It's that amorphous, undefined self doubt that's like a wisp of smoke... not big enough to be called real fear, but large enough to make us avoid doing something we know we can and should do.  It rears its ugly head for many of us when we're asked to speak in front of people whose respect and admiration we desire and whose approval we crave.

      The Big Three:  Respect, Admiration and Approval.  We've sought them from the time we were old enough to know the difference between yes and no, right and wrong, like and dislike.  As children, even before we could define the concepts, we wanted them from our parents and family. In school we worked hard to get them from our teachers and classmates.  As adults we seek them from our spouses, children, colleagues, friends, even from people we meet for the first time or hardly know at all. Certainly when we get up in front of a group to talk about the subjects most dear to our heart, we want them from our listeners, quite possibly more than we're willing to admit.  That wispy doubt that we may not get them, that the audience will not see how deserving we are of respect, admiration and approval, gives us pause and stops us in our tracks.  As Hamlet knew, "...conscience doth make cowards of us all... and enterprises of great pith and moment... lose the name of action."

      Put this into your head.  You are good enough!

      You don't have to take my word for it.  I don't know who said it, but it's true: feeling that we're not good enough is part of the human condition.  Part of our journey through life is to learn to remember that we are good enough.  We have to accept that we are one with the Source (whatever you believe Source to be), and therefore, just by existing we are good enough.
 
      Just by existing you are good enough!
 
      We have all walked through fire in one way or another.  We have survived childhood abuse, serious illness, tremendous loss, aching loneliness.  Our survival has made us strong enough for anything we want to do.  We need to learn to forgive ourselves for not being perfect, because what we are, right this minute, is perfect. We don't need to be any different to succeed.  
      We are good enough. We just need to act.  To move ahead with what we have.
      "I am enough."  Use it as a mantra.  Say it every time before you begin to speak.  The audience will feel your strength and give you the approval you desire.


DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS OR COLLEAGUES who would benefit from seeing this Speaking Is Sexy eZine?  Please forward it to them or send me their email address and I'll send them a copy and tell them it's from you!  www.marionclaire.com 
Want to use this Speaking Is Sexy Tip in your Newsletter or Blog? 
You can, as long as you include this entire blurb:
For over ten years, Marion Claire has coached entrepreneurs, executives, and professionals to become the confident speakers they longed to be.  She's the author of the forthcoming book, "Speaking Is Sexy: Influence Others and Attract What You Love with the Power of Your Voice", due in 2010, and will also help you write your speeches for almost any occasion.  For more information about Marion, and her programs, check out her website at www.marionclaire.com

Would you like to be a
Sexy Speaker?

Are you ready to be a Cool, Confident, and Sexy Speaker every time you face an audience? All you need is the Desire to Inspire and some easy-to-learn techniques of the trade that the speakers you admire all use.  Let me show you "How to Speak to Any Audience with Courage and Comfort!"  In two hours, you can learn how to achieve one of the following:

  • Speak to Win:  How to feel cool, comfortable and charismatic in front of any audience!
  • Mesmerize/Hypnotize:  Discover techniques to make your listeners want to hang onto every word from start to finish!
  • Be Amazing:  Check your fears at the door and feel like a superhero whenever you get up to speak!
Take One, choose All Three, Mix and Match to suit your desires.  Get *special savings* when you select them all.  Amaze yourself and astound your friends.  Give yourself a gift that will last a lifetime.  Let me help you become the speaker you've always wanted be.  Call for your *free* half-hour consultation at 310/659-8956 or email [email protected]
HOW CAN I HELP YOU?

Got a specific question about speaking you'd like answered?  Or would you like to comment on what you've seen here?  Your feedback means a great deal to me.  Contact me at [email protected]

Did you miss previous Speaking Tips? 
Find them here!
 

Let a Sexy Speaker Brighten your Next Event!

Choose from these topics:
  • You Can Be a Sexy Speaker!  How to Use the Power of Your Voice to Make You Irresistible to One Person or a Whole Audience
  • You Can Give a Great Speech, Even If You Think You Can't!  Simple Ways to Leave Your Fear at the Door and Love Being the Center of Attention
  • When You Speak, Everybody Listens!  Persuade Your Audience to Follow You Anywhere When You Follow These Easy-to-Learn Techniques.
...Or ask me to create a talk for you that focuses on your special needs.  Feel free to contact me if you have a last minute cancellation by your previously scheduled speaker!  [email protected]
Marion Recommends...

      Are you looking for a really helpful book on the art of public speaking?  One of my favorites is SPEAK LIKE CHURCHILL, STAND LIKE LINCOLN by James C. Humes (Three Rivers Press, New York, 2002)  It has some of the best secrets of history's greatest speakers that you'll find anywhere, and James C. Humes has written speeches for many of them.  I think it's well worth reading, and I don't get a penny for saying that!
More about Marion Claire
      For over 20 years, I suffered from agoraphobia, the fear of crossing open spaces.  The idea of getting up in front of a group or on a stage absolutely terrified me.  In fact, during the time when I was most severely incapacitated, the idea of getting out of bed in the morning was sometimes more than I could face. 
      Thanks to a good therapist, an excellent M.D., a well-worn library card, the self-help section of my local bookstore, and a bit of better living through chemistry, I was able to learn enough about agoraphobia to begin to cure myself.  I always believed: My mind made me ill, my mind will make me well again.  And it was true.  It happened just that way.
      I read everything I could.  I practiced the desensitizing exercises and mantras that I found in the books or that were taught to me by my therapist. I pushed myself to tackle the challenges of leaving the house, talking to strangers, going to new places, sitting in restaurants, theaters, and movies, even if I had to sit within eyeshot of the exit or only on the aisle in a long row of seats.  Horseshoe seating was always a challenge... I never got to see any play or movie from the center section.  I always took the last seat on the end, so I saw a lot of plays from the side.
      That was then, this is now.  I'm happy to report that the exercises, mantras and other techniques I used did their job and today I sit dead center in any theater without a single twinge of fear.  More importantly, I speak in front of groups of all sizes, shapes and interests no matter where they are. 
      If I can, so can you!  Whether your problem is giving the speech or getting to the event, let me help you overcome it. Contact me at [email protected].
Speak Your Mind with Marion Claire

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