Be Famous for Bouncing Back
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." --Confucius
When I am with my sister Carrie and she catches me doing or saying something she judges to be naive, foolish, or a repeat of past mistakes, she likes to holler at me, "Wisdom Out!" Then she falls over laughing and has to wipe the tears from her eyes. Oh that's rich. How ironic and amusing!
Cheap laughs aside, Carrie's observation draws attention to the dynamic connections between the mistakes people make, how resilient people are, and the wisdom they eventually gain. Wise people are more likely to credit the "College of Hard Knocks" as the source of their wisdom, over any other private or public institution of higher education.
Resilience, which is the ability to bounce back and move forward with optimism after a set back, is a strong characteristic of wisdom. In fact, 100% of people thought to be wise, are also described as being notably resilient. Resilience might also have something to do with happiness. In stunning new research by Dr. Douglas Reeves and myself in our work with leaders and organizations, we found that 94% of people who rate themselves as a "10" on personal and job satisfaction also score in the optimal range of resilience.
We can look to Mark Cerney and Kyle Zimmerman for brilliant examples of resilience.
Mark Cerney founded the Next Of Kin Registry (NOKR, Washington DC) when he learned after the fact, that his beloved childhood caretaker Mimi had passed away. Mark had to wonder; with all the technology available today couldn't we have a database where people could register their next of kin? Despite warnings that this was a pipe dream, Mark and his wife sold their home to pay for the development of the necessary computer program. Within a year, they created the robust database that now five years later, houses next of kin information for millions of people from around the world. Not only was Mark first inspired to action by profound loss, he has resolutely bounced back from every setback since. He says, "When a governor or national leader tells me they don't want to participate in NOKR, to me it just means I have to call them back again the next day."
Like Mark, Albuquerque based photographer and entrepreneur Kyle Zimmerman brings tenacity and creativity to her resilience. In a shaky economy, professional portrait photography is a non-essential service, slashed from many family budgets. Rather than give up, Kyle is out maneuvering the bleak economy by creating new aspects of the work she loves. For example she now teaches photography classes, and has expanded her own artistic applications of photography, creating beautiful silk wall hangings and participating in community art projects. Moreover, Kyle volunteers her time and talent, doing shoots of various non-profit agencies and helping them use those photos to market their services and acquire grants. Kyle told me, "I think this economy is good for us - it is burning off a lot of the unnecessary waste and eventually a healthier community will arise. I am responding to this adversity by being a part of the art community, trying new things. I am growing."
The big question is this: How will you become
more resilient?
Use the S.O.A.P. Tool below to take a leap forward in your own resilience:
1. Where is your life begging for a resilient response?
_______________________________________
2. S (Sass): What attitudes about this are holding you down? Look to the examples of people like Mark and Kyle who prove that fear, anger, and bitterness are not part of the resilience equation.
3. O (Optimism): Know with certainty, and I mean this is the nicest way, that bigger fools than you have achieved remarkable goals and made the world a better place. You will too.
4. A (Action): Bouncing back is dynamic! Find a good friend or coach who will ask you "Action" questions at the end of every day: Did you learn something new today? Did you make a decision or gather information needed to make a decision today? Did you make a request of someone today? Did you help someone today? Did you write down three things you intend to learn, gather, or decide tomorrow to move your dreams forward?
5. P (Perseverance): If anything, setbacks are positive signs that your journey is underway, not signs that your dream should be abandoned. Keep your dreams, but realize your strategies and methods to get there will require adjustments.
Be famous for bouncing back. Send me your resilience stories! elle@wisdomout.com
