In This Issue
VA DUI iPhone App
Hopewell Speed Trap
Battle Bros Update
ABC's of Fall TV
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Virginia DUI Lawyer iPhone/Android App, Speed Traps, Battle Brothers Update 
and Your Fall Must See TV Guide!
  • Greetings!
So, I keep getting asked, "When will you ever write another Newsletter? My smart aleck response- "When Notre Dame starts out a football season 5-0, when the Nationals win the NL East AND when Teddy Roosevelt wins a Presidents Mascot Race at a Nationals game!" Say WHAT? Seriously? Wow, didn't see that coming. Ahem, so, without further ado...
As always, I have been a very busy boy. New DUI book, new iPhone/Android DUI App, new website design with new videos. Plus, I have been interviewed by the local CBS-TV station about Virginia's most notorious speed trap. Speaking of TV, your viewing choices this Fall are all about shows that are 1 (or 0) degrees of separation from the BobBattleLaw.com Newsletter (details below).
I had the right to remain silent...but I didn't have the ability!
DUI App
Bob Battle's Free VA DUI Lawyer App

Although it is hard to imagine how things could get worse in Virginia (see "Hopewell" article below), law enforcement for traffic offenses actually increases as we get into the Fall season (Octoberfest, football tailgaters, Halloween, etc.) Just turn on the TV or radio- the federal government is funding programs like "Over the Limit Under Arrest" or "Click It or Ticket." ("Officers are trained to recognize drivers without seat belts." I'm sorry, if it is night and an approaching car has its lights on, not even Superman could see whether someone was wearing a seat belt. I'm calling BS on this one!)

 

Comedian Ron White has become famous for the line, "I had the right to remain silent...but I didn't have the ability." Of course Ron White is talking about being just too shnockered when he encounters a police officer.  Seriously, as someone who has been practicing law for over 27 years, I am surprised at how few people know what their rights are when they are stopped by a police officer.  

Do you have to do the Roadside Olympics?

Do you have to stand like a flamingo, walk like a chicken, or follow the bouncing pen tip?  

Do you have to blow into the tiny hand-held breathalyzer?  

The correct legal answer is no to all of the above.

I invented my Virginia DUI Lawyer App because I not only see the police routinely asking people to do "tests" that, if they were trained properly, they shouldn't even be asking someone to perform to begin with, but then see these tests admitted into evidence at trial and hear arguments that this should be taken as proof of intoxication. For example, the instructions in the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration Manual states that the officer should not give the One Leg Stand or Walk & Turn tests to anyone with leg, back or inner ear problems or more than 50 pounds overweight, yet I have had clients who are over 150 pounds overweight walking with a cane be asked to do these tests. I also have noticed that every news report that I have seen about a prosecutor, cop or judge getting charged with DUI, indicates that they always refuse these tests and the Preliminary Breath Test. (Things that make you go "Hmmm.") 

I recommend that everyone who legally drinks and drives or takes any medication that one possible side effect may be "drowsiness," get this app and read the "Know Your Rights" section. I explain exactly what to say if you want to assert your legal rights. Now, if you are stopped by police and, while attempting to access my App to assert your rights, you fumble with your phone and the only thing that appears on your phone are a bunch of Angry Birds, then you are definitely too drunk to drive!

 

How Many Drinks can I have and still be safe to drive?

 

The least reliable section of this app is the section called "BAC Calculator." I recommend that you totally ignore this section for several reasons. Here is the rule of thumb:

  • If you are drinking anything stronger then beer or wine, do not drive.
  • If you have had more than 3 drinks over the entire night, do not drive.

Remember, when they talk about 3 "drinks" in an hour will get the average sized person to a .08 BAC, the definition of "drink" is less than you would expect. For beer they are talking about 12 ounces of beer being equal to 1 drink. Just about every sports bar and Ruby Tuesday, Outback, etc. serves 22 to 25 ounce Happy Hour drafts. ("When you go to Happy Hour, you're up for anything, when you're up for anything...don't re-enact scenes from Platoon with Charlie Sheen.") Furthermore, if you are drinking liquor, they are talking about one shot of liquor in a drink. Every bartender in the world knows that the stronger you make your drinks, the better your tips will be. One martini is typically 2 to 3 "drinks." Finally, and this is the trickiest, if you are a wine drinker, a "drink" is measured to be a 5 ounce pour. The average pour at bars and restaurants in a glass of wine is 6 to 8 ounces. (If the bartender is male and interested in more than just tips and you are an attractive woman without a date, you will probably get your wine glass filled to the top or served to you in a Big Gulp cup!)Thus someone who thinks they are "safe" because they have had 2 glasses of wine in an hour, may have had two 8 ounce glasses, which could put them at or above the legal limit of .08. Remember you don't have to be intoxicated to be convicted of DUI in Virginia. One of the ways of proving drunken driving is just having a BAC of .08 or above while driving.

Virginia's most notorious speed trap?
Hopewell wins by a Million Dollar Mile
CBS6 Hopewell

The road through Hopewell, Va., isn't exactly paved with gold, but a mile-and-a-half stretch of interstate 295 generated $2-million worth of speeding tickets for the town last year - and a fight between the AAA Mid-Atlantic and the local sheriff. Hopewell has used 11 deputies to patrol this short stretch of highway 14 hours a day. The results are astounding with tiny Hopewell issuing almost half as many tickets as Fairfax County. The speed limit is 70 mph on that stretch and anything above 80 can and will be charged as Reckless Driving Speeding, a criminal misdemeanor. Bob Battle was interviewed by the local CBS-TV station and stated the obvious- of course it is all about the money. You expected a different response from the creator of the "Virginia is for Speed Traps" t-shirt and author of "The Shocking Truth about Reckless Driving Speeding in Virginia?"



 

Battle Brothers Update
Conor Reads 2 Emmett
Conor reads Emmett "Speed Racer" bedtime story
If I could someday, somehow come back as anyone in history, I would come back as my children! (Now don't tell me that it couldn't happen even in a fantasy world because, well, you're wrong! Isn't this basically the plot of the new movie "Looper." Conor was even telling me about a comic book story line that had 3 alternate "Earths.") 
So their summer was filled with art camp, architecture camp, sleepaway camp, trips to Sea World, Legoland and long weekends at our Nellysford mountain getaway and at Smith Mountain Lake with their grandparents.
Conor is now in 6th grade, middle school in our county, and Emmett is in 2nd grade. 
As seen above, Emmett thinks the world revolves around Conor (which reminds me, making the world spin backwards worked for Superman in getting time to go backwards as well. So now we've got looping, alternative Earth, Earth rotating backwards plus the old soap opera/"Dallas" fave- dream sequence- which would allow me to come back and lead the cushy lives of my sons! But I digress.)
When Conor spent a week at sleepaway camp this summer, we gave him some money to buy something from the camp gift shop for himself. He bought a stuffed animal for brother Emmett!
I know I also have previously reported on impressive vocabulary words that my kids have used. Well Emmett actually taught his second grade teacher a new word. That's right, we got a note last week from Mrs. Gill telling us the hilarious story that Emmett asked if he could add a new vocabulary word to his Spelling notebook. The word "chillaxing!" OK, OK, it may be time for Emmett to spend a little less time watching Disney and Nickolodeon TV shows and more time heading to the library. But wait, there's more. For "Back to School Night," the children in Emmett's class did a project titled "Why I'm a Rock Star." I am proud to say that only Emmett ended his essay by writing "Thank you, thank you very much." Dad and Elvis are very proud.
 
The ABC's of Fall Must See TV
Nashville
So many channels, so little time! What is the best way to decide what to watch this Fall?
Easy, look for a connection with the BobBattleLaw Newsletter.
On Wednesdays, the decision is as easy as ABC. The male star of ABC's new show "Nashville" is none other than loyal newsletter subscriber Charles Esten (aka Chip Puskar.) The show has been getting rave reviews and if last night's premiere was any indication, our boy Chip is about to become a big time star. Well deserved- way to go, Chip. I can now confirm the rumor that notoroius "bandwagoner" Bob-L Head .08 is on his way to Nashville for a photo shoot. Yo, Hayden, it's not too early to get that restraining order! (If you missed last night's show, you can watch it for free on the ABC iPad App.)
But Nashville is just 1 of 3 ABC Wednesday night shows with a Newsletter connection. Charlie McDermott, son of loyal subscriber and marketing guru, Charlie McDermott, plays oldest son Axl on "The Middle." Congrats to young Charlie- the show has already been picked up for syndication. 
Finally, I recently ran into Timmy McConchie who has moved back to Northern Virginia and he informed me that his step-son is Zachary Knighton one of the stars of the sitcom "Happy Endings."
A non-ABC show has the distinction of having 2 cast members with Newsletter ties. "Whitney" star Whitney Cummings is the niece of Arlington lawyer Mark Cummings. Dan O'Brien is the son of DC lawyer David O'Brien and plays the Chicago cop, Mark. Dan, a Notre Dame grad, also starred in the hilarious Xerox commercial as a guy who gets freaked out by a cardboard cutout of the Notre Dame leprechaun. "Whitney" has been moved to Fridays this Fall by NBC. 
Finally, congrats to my old stand-up buddy, Mike Larsen. Mike was part of the writing team nominated for an Emmy for "Real Time with Bill Maher." (The winner, William and Mary Grad Jon Stewart's "The Daily Show.")
By the time you receive this, I will be off to Arlington, where I will be lecturing at the "Great Legal Marketing Summit." I hope to see a lot of our loyal (and patient) Newsletter readers at the Summit, at the Nats game tonight and at my 35th Bishop Ireton High School Reunion Saturday Night.
 
Sincerely,
Bob Battle
P.S. For any "newbie" subscribers who want to "catch up" on old Newsletters, 
visit my Newsletter Archive at www.BobBattleNews.com
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