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Greetings!
 I hope you are staying cool during the August Heat Wave. As you are well aware, I am an entrepreuner with great ideas that leave even Sir Richard Branson speechless. My latest multi-million dollar idea is pictured above- The 7 Pack of Beer! Yes right up there with the "7 Minute Abs" idea in "There's Something About Mary" and speakers that go up to 11 in "Spinal Tap," sales of the 6 pack of beer will be non-existent. Now, if I can only figure out how to get "6 Pack Abs" after a 7 minute abs workout after a 7 pack of beer, I'll be buying Richard Branson's Necker Island from him before the next Newsletter hits your Inbox. (Of course, we all know that the only time we see "beer drinkers" with 6 Pack Abs are the male models they hire in beer commercials.) Sincerely,
Bob Battle
Robert E. Battle, P.C.
804-673-5600
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Bob-L Gets Busy
What does the Donald think of the Romance?
 As always, my alter ego, Bob-L Head is
hanging out with more rich and famous people than Robin Leach ever did.
When asked to comment about being seen in public with the beautiful and brilliant Ivanka Trump,Bob-L coyly replied, "My lips are sealed...no really,
they are sealed- literally."
Of course, Bob-L remains
humble and never forgets
his Richmond roots. In fact,
if you go into the famous
"Bubba's Barbershop" in
the Westhampton Shopping Center in Richmond, Bob-L has been given a spot of honor on the mantle above Karl's barber chair, right between the KISS hat, 3 pigs and the
"Anti-Monkey Butt" powder.
(Hey it was near the pigs and anti-monkey butt powder or next to a Dallas Cowboys hat-
a no brainer for Skins fan
Bob-L!)
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Bob's New Office
As I promised 2 Newsletters ago, here are some pictures of my re-designed office. Thanks to artist extraordinaire Ann Atkinson who painted the Battle "War Room" camouflage. (To see more of Ann's work, click here. Note photos 2- 6 on Row 3 and 1-2 on Row 4 are of my home.)
Also the print in the 2nd picture below is 1 of 2 from Michael Godard in my office and this one is titled "Nervous Grapes." (Yes, the print features a police officer pulling over a wine bottle and making a grape walk a line while blowing into a party favor! The perfect artwork for a DUI lawyer's office!)
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Some words of Wisdom to our College Bound Readers
It's hard to believe that I have
been married and living in Richmond for a decade
until I realize that our 2 flower girls
from our wedding in May 1999
are off to college in a matter of
days! Here, my beautiful niece
Meredith poses with Uncle B
party. (It was such a special occasion that Uncle B broke down and had a beer!) Meredith matriculates to
Radford and Ellen's niece, Madeleine Palen will be a "first year" (see I got it right, Wahoos) at U.Va. (I wonder if they mentioned that they were our former
flower girls on their college applications?!)
Anyway, the advice I refer to in the headline was given by my personal physician and my wife's partner at Va. Family Physicians, Dr. Brian Neely. The advice was so simple, so profound and so funny, I had to share it. While talking to a female patient who is going to be starting college this August, Brian advised simply. "Just don't be that girl at the party." Blank stare from patient. "The one who is totally wasted and ridiculous- no one thinks she is cool although she may be very popular for the evening." The patient still seemed a little confused. Dr. Neely elaborated. "When you are at your first party look around. Trust me, that girl will be there and make a vow to never be her."
And to all the young men who are starting college, remember the immortal words of Dean Wormer to pledgee Flounder after he posted a 0.2 GPA- "Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son."
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About Robert E. Battle, P.C.
Thank your customer, tell them how valuable they are to you, but don't go overboard. Insincerity is easy to spot.*
_________________
*Those words came with this email template. Again I felt they were so profound, I left them unedited.
Bob Battle
Robert E. Battle, P.C.
Richmond, Virginia 23230
804-673-5600
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