In the midst of winter, we look for that which can warm us. In this particular season, in the midst of grave suffering in the world, earthquakes, danger and a sense of vulnerability, we have both the need to find comfort and stability and to offer what we can to ease the pain of others. Whether or not we are in a position to actually go to those who are suffering in Haiti, or other places in the world, we are always in a position to turn to those in our own lives, and give what we can to them, to share the power of love and kindness, which person by person, transforms the world.

This newsletter is dedicated to those who wish to learn the simple laws of love, how to practice them in all their relationships. Combining Eastern and Western teachings and practices, it will also offer psychological, spiritual and practical wisdom on handling all kinds of

This pattern can continue throughout an entire life. In some cases one person consistently plays the role of the feeder and other the role of the one being fed. Some withhold love so their partner will do what they want of them. Others feed their partners on demand. Sex is often used in this fashion, providing a sense of being loved, wanted, cared for and nourished. When it is withheld or rationed out, the hungry partner feels devastated.

Most are not aware of the many kinds of food the universe abundantly provides. As in childhood, they become fixated on one person, who they see as their sole source of well being. The first thing to notice is the intense orientation towards receiving. The feeling is that in order to feel full and nourished we must be fed. This is the idea of the infant - feed me and all will be well.

It is necessary to stop a moment and recognize exactly what kind of food we are consuming in the relationship, is it healthy, is it food our system can digest? Although fast food may taste good and initially fill us up, it can have bad side effects. The same is true in relationships. Although what we get from our partner is initially hot and spicy it can cause heartburn later on. We can eat all day, but if we do not taste and digest what we are eating, we will never receive the nourishment we need.

And beyond that, in order for a life and relationship to remain strong, all kinds of food are needed, emotional, mental and spiritual food. And these foods must be both received and given. Some spend all their time trying to change their partners, trying to get a different kind of food. Rather than find another way to get what they want and need, they spend all their time feeling dissatisfied. It's as though they went to an apple tree, who was giving fabulous apples, all the time longing for pears. Rather than walk down the street to the pear tree and take one, they rail against the fine apple tree, who cannot produce a pear, no matter how hard they try. Some of us are simply addicted to being dissatisfied.

In order to live a life of love, we must learn to take what is given and offer thanks in return. If we spend all our time wanting to change the person, rejecting their essential qualities, this is a sure fire recipe for indigestion. Are we able to absorb what is useful and discard the rest? Can we take in the beauty and value offered, and by-pass that which is not valuable? Honor and be grateful for that which you receive. Don't become bitter and spend all your time focusing on that which the person is not able to provide.

It is one thing to learn how to find the right food, enjoy and absorb it, but, beyond that, in order to receive all the nourishment we have ever needed, we must learn how to become the cook - how to nourish and feed others as well. Being the cook becomes a deep training in offering, not only the food, but one's entire self. When one is in this state of being, it is impossible to be hungry or discontent.

Feeding others we are fed. Being the cook means learning how to appreciate the needs of others, and being willing to completely fill them, on time. As we do this, a strange thing happens, our own hunger completely fades away. We are able to taste life (and people) as they are given. Our relationships turn around 180 degrees. It no longer becomes a question of what the other is or isn't giving. It's a question of what can be offered. As we place our attention upon the needs of others and find ways of giving to them, not only does our hunger subside, but we begin to feel full. As this process continues, there is a deeper lesson to learn, that a never ending source of all kinds nourishment exists within us. We need never feel empty or hungry again.

Steppingstones To Love: (Exercises for Everyday Life)

Nourishing Self And Others

1) Favorite Food

What is your favorite food in relationships? What is it you hunger for daily? How do you get fed? Does someone else feed you? Do you feed yourself? Is there some other way you could get this particular nourishment? Take a little while and find out.

2) Emotional Indigestion

What kind of food are you now absorbing in your relationships that you cannot digest? Why do you keep eating it? What do you want from it? Is there some other food that could substitute?

3) Offerings

What are the offerings you bring to life? What are you willing to give unconditionally? Spend time considering what it is that you can truly offer that will nourish and gladden others and yourself as well. When a large part of our lives consist in making these kind of offerings, we fall in love with life itself.

This is article is based upon Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships). www.truthaboutlove.com

Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships)

Probably the biggest need all of us have is to experience a wonderful, loving relationship where we can be ourselves, and share our lives with someone meaningful. This is exactly what you will be able to create when you begin to work with the unique program inside my e-book, Save Your Relationship.

In the program you will discover the common mistakes people make in relationships and how to turn them around. You'll see why it's impossible to fail at love, once you understand how to build a foundation that can weather any storm.

Why not throw away old relationship habits and start new right now?

To find out more and order a copy, go to the website, http:.//www.truthaboutlove.comJewish Dharma is the first guide to the authentic parctice of both Judaism and Zen. We see how each practice enriches, illuminates and challenges the other and how they provide keys to the personal struggles we face each day.

Each chapter deals with different life issues, such as loneliness, relationships, conflict, finding peace and understanding and ways of healing suffering. The book includes personal narraitive, parables, quotations, discussion and specific exercises so the reader can integrate the material into their lives.

A Jewish heart is warm, giving, devoted to family and friends; a Zen eye is fresh, direct, spontaneous and in the moment. These practices are like two wings of a bird; both are needed to be able to fly.

Why not give this as a holiday gift?

To Get A Copy of Save Your Relationship

A wonderful gift you can give to the world is not to complain about your misfortunes. Everyone has difficulties they deal with. people do not wish to hear more troubles, but would like to hear words of inspiration.

No matter what you are going through, when people ask how you are, find something good to say. Focus on anything you feel good about, a success at work, the health of your children, meeting up with an old friend. Find that which is beautiful and life giving and share it.

This attitude will not only uplift others, but uplift you as well.

Living By Zen (Timeless Truths For Everyday Life)

--Deborah Durbin

Many books have been written about the query letter. But few have been written by literary agents, who receive thousands of queries each year and who grapple with them on a daily basis. Even fewer books have been written by literary agents who are currently active, who are willing to write from the trenches and offer their perspective on why they reject query letters, and why they accept them.

New York literary agent Noah Lukeman, President of Lukeman Literary Management Ltd, has represented multiple New York Times bestsellers, winners of the Pulitzer Prize and American Book Award, National Book Award Finalists, and has written three critically-acclaimed books on the craft of writing (The First Five Pages, The Plot Thickens, and A Dash of Style). During his last 13 years as a literary agent he has read thousands of query letters and now, for the first time, he offers his insights on the query letter, sharing an insider's perspective, giving insights and practical tips about what works and what doesn't.

HOW TO WRITE A GREAT QUERY LETTER: INSIDER TIPS AND TECHNIQUES FOR SUCCESS is a must-read for any writer serious about being published. Designed for writers of fiction and non- fiction, for screenwriters and poets, it speaks to a broad range of authors, offering principles that will help lead to success no matter what your craft. Practical, engaging, filled with exercises, anecdotes and sidebars, this 80 page e-book takes you on a journey, will transform your query letter from a document that could be rejected to a document that will make agents take you seriously.

HOW TO WRITE A GREAT QUERY LETTER includes:

· The 3 Paragraph Rule

· 3 Common Mistakes to Avoid in Your Plot Paragraph

· 4 Common Mistakes to Avoid in Your Author Bio

· Fiction Versus Non-Fiction (How a Query Letter Will Differ)

· Checklist: 30 Mistakes to Avoid in Your Query Letter

just download your book HOW TO WRITE A GREAT QUERY LETTER

As of May, 2007, Mr. Lukeman has made his e-book HOW TO WRITE A GREAT QUERY LETTER free, as a way to give back to the writing community. .

NEW! If you would also like to read 20 free pages of Noah Lukeman's new book, How to Land (and Keep) a Literary Agent, go to:

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How To Write A Great Query Letter (Click Here)

Tuesday night, February 16th. For more information, contact us: topspeaker@yahoo.com

The Enlightened Living Institute is opening its doors this month. More information will be provided in a separate mailing.

Dr Shoshanna is available for counseling, talks and workshops of all kinds. Contact her at: topspeaker@yahoo.com.

Simple sitting meditation available on Monday nights, from 7-9 p.m.

Introductory meditation workshops available as well.

The Gateless Zendo

It is very shocking and disturbing to discover that we have been talked about behind our backs, especially by someone we considered to be a good friend. Gossiping and slander are one of the most painful and destructive activities anyone can engage in.

However, before you end the relationship, give your friend a chance to tell you what happened from their point of view. Open, honest communication is always the best way to go. Perhaps she did not mean it in the way intended, or perhaps the other friends are distorting what she said. Before you take a drastic action, such as ending a relationship, take time to listen carefully to all sides of the story. Let your friend know how shocked and hurt you've been.

Then, for your sake, as well as the others, see if you can discover what caused the person to be so upset with you. The more you can discover, the easier it will be for you to forgive them. Whether or not you want the relationship to continue, forgiveness and letting go of hurt is always best. Otherwise you can carry a great burden of resentment and anger with you, which will affect "you" negatively in many ways.

Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships

Author, You Are The Healer: Discover Your Miraculous Potential to Heal Yourself and Others

www.amazinghealer.com

Gene@amazi ng nghealer.com, (914) 232-4409

I wish to highly recommend Gene Krackhel. Gene has testified success in working on people with cancer and breakthroughs in helping people deal with stress and release fear, grief and anxiety. His speciality is fixing broken hearts.

Formerly on the staff at Northern Westchester Hospital's Center for Health and Healing, Gene now devotes all his time to his own healing practice in Katonah, while collaborating with therapists, hospitals, MD's and other health care professionals.

His workshops are given in large corporations, organizations, colleges, holistic centers, etc. He has been featured on TV and radio talk shows and has released several CD's of his work.

Contact him directly at

Gene@amazinghealer.com

Gene Krackhel

Each chapter deals with different life issues, such as loneliness, relationships, conflict, finding peace and understanding and ways of healing suffering. The book includes personal narraitive, parables, quotations, discussion and specific exercises so the reader can integrate the material into their lives.

A Jewish heart is warm, giving, devoted to family and friends; a Zen eye is fresh, direct, spontaneous and in the moment. These practices are like two wings of a bird; both are needed to be able to fly.

Why not give this as a holiday gift?

GIVE A GIFT

Give a session with Dr. Shoshanna in person or on the phone, or invite Dr. Shoshanna to talk or offer a workshop in your community. She speaks on many topics including:

Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships

From Anger to Peace of Mind (The Anger Diet)

Journey Through Illness , Loss and Change

Jewish Dharma (A Guide to the Practice of Judaism and Zen) and how it can heal your life

Dr. Shoshanna's programs are available as talks, half day workshops, full day , or week-end workshops.Contact us for more information. topspeaker@yahoo.com

Or, perhaps you'd like to give someone you care for a copy of one of Dr. Shoshanna's books such as Zen and The Art of Falling In Love, filled with delightful stories,guidelines and steppingstones to love, based on Zen practice.

Get a copy of Jewish Dharma today.

Everyone wants to be beautiful, young, healthy, fit and to feel good about themselves. There is no end to available diets and workouts, but the most important diet has been overlooked.

This is a diet that releases stress, lets you sleep soundly at night, reduces cravings and brings new friends into your life. This diet gets rid of the number one toxin that destroys well-being - anger.

In Dr. Shoshanna book, The Anger Diet, you'll learn about the 24 forms of anger, the lies anger tells you, and how to stop it fast with the Emergency Technique. Each day you'll give up a different form of anger and replace it with a life changing antidote. The life changing effects of this diet will appear soon after starting.

There's no need to keep going the way you have been. Choose to feel good today. Get a copy of The Anger Diet and see how easy it is to say no to upset.

The greatest obstacle we have to feeling good, healthy and loving is anger which accosts us in many ways and camouflages itself.

Melt Away Toxic Feelings On The Anger Diet

In this revealing, intimate book, I ask the men themselves and they provide some startling and enlightening answers. Drawing on hundreds of interviews, I present men's own words and perspectives about the various reasons their relationships fell apart. You'll be surprised and relieved to hear what they have to say. Usually the reason men leave, has nothing to do with you. Some of the topics covered in the book include, The Fear of Committment, Ghosts of Past Relationships, The Mid-Life Crisis, The Repetition Compulsion, Competition With In-Laws, The Fantasy Woman, and many others.

Why keep going without understanding?Take new steps today to learn more about men and relationships, feel better about yourselves and findthe courage to love again.

Living by Zen (Timeless Truths for Everyday Life). www.livingbyzen.com

In this book you will discover the 2,000 Year Old Zen Secrets To Being Calm, Balanced and Positive, No Matter What Is Going On.

Probably the biggest need all of us have is to feel calm, balanced and positive no matter what is going on in our lives. This is exactly what you will feel when you begin to work with the unique program inside this e- book.

Living By Zen explores the things that steal your peace of mind, different ways you handle stress and why they do not work.

Download the book now and enjoy.

Living By Zen