Greetings!

As March approaches we find ourselves on the cusp of spring. Although there are still wintery days ahead, the freshness of spring is in the air.

This is a good time to do some house cleaning, to empty out old closet drawers and empty out some clutter in our hearts as well.

In March we can march on, and begin preparations for putting everything in order and making our relationships the best they can be.

This newsletter is dedicated to the simple laws of love which show us how to build healthy, satisfying, loving relationships and becoming all we are meant to be.

Even a wonderful relationship can become difficult when we don't know the basic laws of love and how to apply them in our everyday lives.

Probably the biggest need all of us have is to experience a wonderful, loving relationship where we can be ourselves, and share our lives with so meone meaningful. This is exactly what you will be able to create when you begin to work with the unique program inside my e-book, Save Your Relationship.

In the program you will discover the common mistakes people make in relationships and how to turn them around. You'll see why it's impossible to fail at love, once you understand how to build a foundation that can weather any storm.

Why not throw away old relationship habits and start new right now?

To find out more and order a copy, go to the website, http:.//www.truthaboutlove.com

Find out more at Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships)

However, the truth is that there are easy, unfailing steps we can take to healing our relationship right now. These steps are easy, enjoyable and life giving, both for ourself and others. We do not have to learn anything special techniques, probe our unconscious for hidden complexes or suffer great pains along the way. All that is needed is a willingness to put these simple steps into action one by one, this very day.

These steps will open new doors for you, clear you mind and lift your spirits. This very day upset will fade and you will feel brand new.

Step 1: Take responsibility for whatever’s happening. Realize that for things to be different, you must be different.

Many try to change their relationships by finding what’s wrong in their partner, fixing it, talking things over endlessly or if that doesn’t work, finding someone new. They do not realize that whatever is happening, they are participating in it, and wherever they go, whatever new relationship they start, they take themselves along.

In order to create the relationship you want, you must first take time to become new. Commit to spending even 15 minutes a day, every day, in this endeavor. Commitment is the first step. Putting time aside daily to do this makes the commitment active in your life. Doing this on a daily basis, builds much needed momentum. What you focus upon increases in your life. Carve out a few minutes each day that belong only to you.

During this personal time, take complete responsibility for what is happening in the relationship. This does not mean “blaming yourself”. It means take a good look at what you are doing to keep the patterns going, and what benefits you are getting out of the situation as it is right now. Give up blaming anyone. Just take a good hard look. When you see your part in the situation you become empowered to make real changes.

Step 2: How you think affects how you feel, and how others respond to you.

Our thoughts are not really secret or silent. When we either secretly or loudly blame, criticize or want to change another, we create an atmosphere around us which pushes the person away. Stop indulging in negative thinking. Realize this is a choice you make. You have the power to change the way you think. You can choose positive, loving thoughts. You can stop the endless stream of inner and outer negativity that assaults each of us daily. Watch which thoughts you are dwelling upon. Choose to turn them around. Replace each negative thought with a positive one. Do this for a short, but concentrated period throughout the day.

When you look at your partner consciously focus upon the beauty within them. Say to yourself, “I salute the goodness in you.” On some level they will hear you, feel uplifted and respond. What you are really doing here is calling forth the best in them. And in yourself as well.

Step 3: Do What You Love Together

What we love has power in our lives. Most of us think it’s impractical to take time out simply to do what they love. Nothing could be further from the truth. Doing what we love is medicine. It makes us happy, inspires us and stimulates the imagination. As we do what we love, we connect with that which is deepest and most creative in ourselves.

Take time to do what you love together. Find activities and places you both find meaningful and uplifting. Make sure you share them. Many relationships become stuck because the partners are spending more time alone doing what they care about than together. Bonds are built through action and through sharing meaningful times. Most people wait to be happy – making it depend upon the way their partner behaves. But, when you do what you love, you are happy each moment, just with the doing itself. This is a wonderful way to be together – not dependent upon what happens in the future - just fulfilled with each moment as it comes along.

Step 4: Give Up Anger, Day by Day

The most self-destructive habit many of us have is our indulging in anger, grudges, resentment and revenge. Not only does this take our own health, joy and well being away, but it actively disrupts our ability to have the life we want the most. Giving up anger is the number one best thing you can do for yourself and your relationship. There are 24 forms of anger and they camouflage themselves in many ways. Find out how this is working in your life, and then take the time to pulls these weeds out of your relationship. Take Dr. Shoshanna's Anger Diet. Go on a diet from anger. You will be delighted at how much lighter, calmer and happier you feel.

Step 5: Let the Past Be The Past

We often carry around so much baggage that it is amazing we can even take another step. Many of us feel that past events are unresolved or unfinished until we work them out. However, it is wonderful to realize that everything works out the way it does. At any moment we have the power to declare things fine and complete. At any moment we can stop trying to change and control the way life has happened thus far. Make that moment now. Put down old baggage. Let go of old events in your relationship and accept that things work out the way they do. Resolve to start fresh together. This is a new day.

Step 6: Think of Your Partner Before Yourself

Usually we approach relationships wondering what we can get out of them, how they will enhance our lives. This attitude creates a great deal of tension in us and opposition in others as well. In order to find happiness in all your relationships, just turn this around. Think of the other person first. When with them, ask yourself, how can I serve you today? What can I do to make your day wonderful? Not only will the person feel the change in your approach to them, but you will feel wonderful and fulfilled. Your sense of greed, deprivation, self-absorption and upset will vanish as you fill yourself with thoughts and deeds of service to others.

Step 7: Open Your Heart To Loving Others

So many say they can’t find a relationship that works, they are lonely, without love. But the truth is, each of us already has all the love we will ever need, right inside of us. And what’s more we can experience this love all day long. Each day find someone you can give some love to – a child, neighbor, merchant, anyone you meet along the way. There is no end to the people who appear in your life who can benefit from some warmth and love. A smile, a kind word, a moment of acknowledgment. Try it out and see. Practice love and watch what happens to all your relationships. The more you are filled with love, the more your relationship will bloom.

Step 8: Find Three Things To Be Grateful For

Appreciate all you are given by your partner each day. Usually our focus turns to what is going wrong, to what we do not have and to the mistakes we make. It’s very important to take charge of our focus and turn this around. In fact, we are all receiving endless gifts from the moment we wake up. We must become aware of what we are receiving, moment by moment, and be grateful for it. And, then, it is crucial to take time to offer thanks. If you fill your day with appreciation, with noticing what you are being given and making the effort to acknowledge it and offer thanks, you will soon discover that depression and gratitude cannot live in the same person at the same time. Give up depression and upset and welcome the gifts you are receiving right now. Cc/author/2005

"Caring for others,

makes the whole world come alive."

Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships)

These workshops will be on-going - half day (and then full day).There will be specific steps, exercises, guidelines and information presented.Please let us know if you are interested in more information about this, or to be on the notification list. Contact us at tospeaker@yahoo.com

Read More Timeless Truths For Everyday Life in Living By Zen, http://www.livingbyzen.com

As the days goes on, our mind becomes filled with problems, difficulties, complications and resentments. It is easy to lose track of inspiring thoughts. It is very important to keep positive thoughts around where you can see them. This coutneracts negativity and is like vitamins for your spirit and soul.

Write down two or three inspiring thoughts on small index cards (in bright colors), and put them where you can see them during the day. When you glance at them, take time to actually stop and read them aloud. This will break into any negative momentum that has been established and refocus your thoughts.

Read more about a life gratitude in Living By Zen (Timeless Truths For Everyday Life)

Give someone you care for a copy of Zen and The Art of Falling In Love, filled with delightful stories, guidelines and steppingstones to love, based on Zen practice.

Or, download a copy of Save Your Relationship, http://www.truthaboutlove.com, and give this. (Together they make a wonderful package).

Would you like to learn how to melt away toxic feelings easily? Get a copy of The Anger Diet, and go on a diet from anger. This will easily take you from anger to forgiveness and love. (www.theangerdiet.com).

Dr. Shoshanna, psychologist and relationship expert, is available for counselling and therapy both in person and on the phone. She is also available for talks and workshops based upon her books. For more information contact her at topspeaker@yahoo.com, or http://www.brendashoshanna.com

Learn more about Dr. Shoshanna at her website: http://www.brendashoshanna.com

Answer: Before you can find someone you feel is right for you, you have to be right with yourself. Take some time to really know yourself. What is it you truly want, value and can offer in a relationship? What is truly meaningful to you?

Often we look for a partner based upon a fantasy image of what we want in our lives and who we are. We search for someone based upon the desire to fit in, or to please others who are important to us. This never works. When you know who you truly are, you will naturally gravitate to those who are compatible and the right relationship will appear naturally.

Learn more about Dr Shoshanna at her website: http://www.brendashoshanna.com

I am pleased to let you know about my new book just published, The Anger Diet (Thirty Days to Stress- Free Living), Andrews McMeel. Especially at this time of loss,it is so important to know how to handle anger constructively and melt away toxic feelings. There is no end to the available diets and workouts. But the most important diet of all has been overlooked.

This is a diet that releases stress, lets you sleep soundly at night, reduces cravings and upset and makes you feel young again. This diet gets rid of the number one toxin that destroys your well-being - anger.

This is a wonderful book for the holiday season. for releasing stress and enjoying the true spirit of the season.

And it's a wonderful gift.

Find out more at http://theangerdiet.com