What are You Not Doing Because You're Afraid?
John
is a new client who is frustrated with his work partner but is afraid to say
anything to him for fear of damaging their working relationship. Day after day
he goes to work, puts on his best game face, does his job and some of his
co-workers, then goes home and complains about it.
Joan
is a 35 year old hairdresser who has always wanted to have her own salon but
doesn't because she is afraid to make the leap.
Each morning she wakes up she dreams of having her own place but when it
comes to taking the first step becomes paralyzed by the fear.
Scott
wants to move up in his career. He knows he has what it takes to be successful
but he is afraid of speaking in front of groups of people and the next job on
his career ladder involves a lot of it. He's stuck.
It
happens to all of us, we see where we want to go or what we want to do but
don't because we're afraid - in doing so we step out of being a leader in our
own lives. In big and small ways I see clients sabotage their efforts to make
changes for fear of failing, looking bad or causing a conflict. We make up
excuses and vow to do things differently the next time but if you're like many
people, the next time a similar situation comes around, you find yourself acting
the same way and making the same excuses. It comes at a cost.
In the examples above, John is afraid to have a
conversation that has the potential to improve his working relationship with
his partner because he is afraid it might cause more conflict. The price he pays
for giving into his fear is his
effectiveness on the job and
his fulfillment at work. Each time Joan pushes away her dream of having her own
salon she feels worse about herself and becomes more resigned to this is the way
things are always going to be and by Scott allowing his fear to take over it
costs him the chance to move forward in his career.
We
do however have a choice. Fear is a normal response to stepping out of our
comfort zone and taking on new challenges. I have yet to meet a client who
isn't afraid to take action to make the changes he or she wants to make.
Whether leading a corporate re-organization, having a difficult conversation or
learning to do something new people who are leaders in their own lives notice
when they are afraid and choose to act rather than allowing themselves to be
paralyzed by
the fear. They acknowledge
the fear, do all they can within reason to mitigate the risk, then step out of
their comfort zone and into action. With each step they take they build
confidence and grow then ask themselves what took them so long to get started.
-
What are you not doing
because you're afraid?
-
What's one step you can take
to get started?
I am interested in your thoughts and comments about
this article. Is it helpful? Why? Why not? Send your comments to me at
Bill@PullenAssociates.com.
