Robert Hayes-McCoy Copywriters - Ezine Newsletter
In This Issue You Will Enjoy Reading About
New Crest
Bear with me
It's a 'bear market' out there
Hear any Rocky Mountain Bear Jokes Lately?
Copywriter fed to bears for failing to communicate with 20%...
 Here are some quick links
to useful websites
 
 Have you friends or colleagues who would like to Join my  ezine circulation list?

The mini cup of coffee

  It's totally free. Assure them that they can opt out at any time, without fuss or bother.

Join Our Circulation List 
Look out for the new crest on our speech website 
 

Member of Speechwriters' Guild

 
Need-a-speech.com is a dedicated speech website which features a wide range of speeches for all occasions from weddings to retirement.
 
You are very welcome to pay it a quick visit and have a look around.
 
Simply Click Here
 
ahem! Bear with me ... while I tell you about my awards for copywriting 
Over the years, my copywriting and creative input has produced many award winning campaigns directly for clients and Direct Marketing Agencies: Gold, Silver and Bronze.
 
These awards now grace the boardrooms, web sites and reception areas of these agencies and clients all over the country.
 
The 20 or so, additional awards that are listed on my website are those that are proudly displayed on the walls of my own office.
 
It's an impressive list. Click here to have a quick look at it.
 
It's a real 'Bear market'
out there
 
 
 A bear market is a prolonged period in which investment prices fall, accompanied by widespread pessimism. If the period of falling stock prices is short and immediately follows a period of rising stock prices, it is called a correction.
 Bear markets usually occur when the economy is in a recession and unemployment is high, or when inflation is rising quickly.
 
The most famous bear market of all was the Great Depression of the 1930s. The term 'bear' has been used in a financial context since the early 18th Century. While the origins are unclear, the term may have originated from traders who sold bear skins with the expectations that prices would fall in the future. It's the opposite of a bull market. 
A Special Black Bear Issue July 2009 
Greetings!
  
I'm back from camping in the Canadian Rockies!
 
We saw loads of bears 
 
Saw loads of black bears!
 
And all kinds of other wild animals too! 
 
At the end of this ezine you'll find a link to a special article titled 'Copywriter fed to the bears'. If you are in a great hurry to read it:  Click here immediately.
 
Otherwise, if I can help you with your next direct marketing, email or web site copy requirements... give me a roar on 01-2603949 or email me at [email protected] and I'll be delighted to hear from you.
  
Kindest regards
You are welcome to contact me at any time  
 Robert Hayes-McCoy
Have you heard any Rocky Mountain bear jokes lately?
 
You are in bear country 
 If not, enjoy the following ones...

 
How you can protect yourself from most bears
 
In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Alberta Department of Fishing and Gaming is advising hikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert of bears while in the field. The department has posted the following notice:

We advise that outdoorsmen wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle any bears.
We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear.
It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity.

Outdoorsmen should recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear faeces. Black bear faeces are smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear faeces have little bells in it and smell like pepper.
 
The hikers who ran into a bear
Two hikers are out hiking. All of a sudden, a bear starts chasing them.

They climb a tree, but the bear starts climbing up the tree after them. The first hiker gets his sneakers out of his knapsack and starts putting them on.

The second hiker says, "What are you doing?"
The first responds, "I figure when the bear gets close to us, we'll have to jump down and make a run for it."

The second says, "Are you crazy? Don't you know you can't outrun a bear?

The first guy says, "I don't have to outrun the bear... I only have to outrun you!"

 
The bear that walks into a bar
 
A black bear walks into a bar. Then he sits down and orders a beer.

The bartender, amazed that this bear can actually talk, gives him a beer.

The bear says, "What do I owe you?"

The bartender stops and thinks for a moment.

"Even though this bear is smart," thinks the bartender, "he probably hasn't been in many bars."

So the bartender says, "That'll be ten dollars."

The bear forks out the money and starts drinking his beer.

After a few minutes, the bartender can't restrain his curiosity, so he walks back over to the bear and tries to strike up a conversation.

"You know, we don't get many bears in this bar."

The bear looks up from his beer and says, "Well, at ten bucks a beer, I'm not surprised."

 
How you tell a brown bear from a grizzly bear?

Climb a tree. If the bear climbs it and eats you, it's a brown bear.

If the bear knocks the tree down and eats you, it's a grizzly.
 
    
The bear and the rabbit
 
A black bear and a rabbit were talking.

The bear asked the rabbit, "Do you have trouble with poop sticking to your fur?"

The rabbit said, "No."

So the bear picked up the rabbit and used it to wipe his butt.
Copywriter fed to bears for failing to communicate with 20% of readers
Robert Hayes-McCoy
Hey!
  
 
Do you know that one-quarter of Irish adults aged between the ages of 16 and 65 are functionally illiterate?
 
And approximately another 20% of Irish people aged between 16 and 65 can only perform simple reading and writing tasks?
 
Add those two figures together and you get an amazing total of 45% of people who may not be able to understand what you write to them. 
 
Click here if you'd like to read more about this huge gap in your potential market and how some Irish copywriters deserve to be fed to the bears.
 
Sincerely,
You are welcome to contact me at any time 
Robert Hayes-McCoy
Robert Hayes-McCoy Copywriters