Possibilities Newsletter
August 2008
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Hello from Bill O'Hanlon. You are receiving this newsletter because you have signed up for it. If for any reason, you don't want to continue receiving it (it comes out once a month), please use the unsubscribe button at the bottom of this email.
After a month off, I'm back at work.
More poetry. Look for Your Other Half (Antonio Machado)Don't trace out your profile forget your side view all that is outer stuff Look for your other half who walks always next to you and tends to be who you aren't Yours in possibilities, Bill O'Hanlon, Santa Fe, New Mexico ( PossiBill@aol.com)
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Cool Stuff
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Book of the month: Sway: The Irresistible Pull of Irrational Behavior
by Ori Brafman and Rom Brafman (Doubleday, 2008)
This book, the latest of several I have read about the irrational biases most of us have when making decisions (that sometimes lead to bad decisions or costly mistakes), is perhaps the best. A short book and easy to read, written by brothers, one a psychologist and one an organizational expert. One of the topics shows how our diagnoses of people or situations can bias us. See the research of the month below for more on that one. But there are some amazing pieces of research and fascinating anecdotes in the book, including how a Harvard professor regularly gets Harvard business students to pay as much as $204 for a $20 bill.
Check out Sway on Amazon.com
Quotation of the month: "I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they are going and hook up with them later." -Mitch Hedberg
Silly video of the month: http://www.flixxy.com/sumsing-turbo-3000-cellphone.htm
Cool Research of the month: Labels can bias us: This is one reason why diagnosis is a sensitive issue
A substitute professor at Harvard Business School was introduced with a biographical paragraph given to all students, but half of which had one slight difference in the description: "rather cold" or "very warm." The class got the same lecture, but at the end, when asked to rate the instructor for possible hiring as an instructor, the students who had read the description of a "very warm" person rated him as "good-natured, considerate of others, informal, sociable, popular, humorous, and humane," while those who read that he was "rather cold" rated him as "self-centered, formal, unsociable, unpopular, irritable, humorless, and ruthless."
Reference: Kelley, H.H. (1950). "The warm-cold variable in first impressions of persons," Journal of Personality, 18, 431-439.
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| Handout of the Month
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Overcoming Perceptual and Decision-Making Biases
Bill O'Hanlon, www.billohanlon.com, PossiBill@aol.com
505.983.2843
[Feel free to copy and share this handout, but please leave my contact information on it. If you want to use it for any commercial (money-making) activity, contact me for specific permission.]
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In line with the research of the month cited above, here is a handout for mitigating our natural biases and distorted decision-making mistakes.
Bias: AVOIDANCE OF LOSS/LOSS AVERSION
This is the one that gets gamblers to keep gambling trying to win back previous losses until they lose it all and also what sways people to hold onto bad investments. People are highly motivated to avoid loss.
Fix: Make a plan and stick to it before you are faced with an in-the-moment decision; avoid snap judgments, which are often prey to irrational forces; think long-term.
Bias: COMMITMENT
We tend to stick with the way we've previously done things.
Fix: Let go of the past; what's done is done. Let go of old identities and previous success strategies that are no longer working or that don't serve in the present circumstances. Imagine you are just arriving in this situation with no prior background commitment or track record; how would you approach it?
Bias: VALUE ATTRIBUTIONS AND DIAGNOSIS
What value or label is put on something or someone sways our views of them.
Fix: Accept that your initial impression might be off. Observe what is actually happening and the ways things are, rather than how they appear Look beyond the packaging and price to the content. Keep conclusions tentative and seek out facts, especially those that might contradict our diagnostic impressions or attributed values. Search for exceptions.
Bias: FAIRNESS
We are locked into our own personal/cultural/familial sense of what is fair, which may be very different from what others perceive as fair.
Fix: Focus on desired outcomes rather than justice or fairness. Keep others involved in your decision-making process and thinking to increase their perceptions of your fairness if you have differing senses of what is fair.
Bias: GROUP THINK
People will almost always go along with the crowd, even if the crowd is wrong, when there is unanimity (or seeming unanimity) in the group. If there is one dissenter, even if that dissenter is off-base or wrong, others will feel emboldened to dissent as well.
Fix: Encourage, include and support dissenters in groups.
Bias: ALTRUISTIC VS. PAID ACTIVITIES
People have different responses (and perhaps even use different parts of their brains) when dealing with paid vs. volunteer or altruistic activities. If compensation is introduced into a situation, the rules for decision-making change.
Fix: If you want people to do good, help others or cooperate, do not introduce money or any other form of material reward into the situation.
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Upcoming Boot Camps and Intensives in Santa Fe
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Book Writing and Publishing Boot Camp; Santa Fe, NM
Get motivated to write a book, write it well and get it published
November 17-21, 2008
with Bill O'Hanlon
See details at http://www.getyourbookwritten.com/publishingcourse/SantaFe.html
Public Speaker Book Camp
January 12-16, 2009
Small group coaching for becoming a paid speaker, delivering compelling talks and workshops and getting on the speaking circuit in Santa Fe
with Bill O'Hanlon
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For details, visit:
http://www.billohanlon.com/events/intensives/presentersbootcamp/billohanlon.html
The Possibilities Process: Breakthrough to new places in your life
January 19-25, 2009
Small
group personal development seminar; challenge your limits, stop being small and shift your life to the next level
with Bill O'Hanlon
email Bill directly to arrange a phone call to ensure eligibility and fit: email PossiBill@aol.com
February 16-20, 2009
Internet and Computer Boot Camp
Using the Web for More Time, to Spread Your Message More Effectively and to Create Ongoing Sources of Passive Income; Santa Fe, NM
with Bill O'Hanlon and Ryan Nagy, aka "The Web Whisperers"
For details, visit:
http://www.thewebwhisperers.com
I usually offer each of these once a year and they often fill very quickly, so if you are interested, please act quickly to reserve your place.
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Announcements: Bill's New Teleseminar Starting Soon; Mind-Body Conference; and a great discount on an Intensive Seminar from Michele Weiner-Davis
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New teleseminar starting Wednesday, August 6 [But you can listen to recordings of the calls if the seminar has already started by the time you read this or if the schedule doesn't work for you]
Enough Time AND Enough Money: How to Cut Your Worklife and Personal Projects in Half and Still Make a Great Living
The calls will happen on four successive Wednesday evenings in August (August 6, 13, 20, and 27) at 9 p.m. Eastern time, 8 p.m. Central time, 7 p.m. Mountain time and 6 p.m. Pacific time.
If you can't make any of the calls, a replay will be available for each of them.
If accomplishing this is worth $100 to you, sign up now by clicking the link
Sign up for the teleseminar series
After you sign up, you'll get instructions by email for how to get on the call.
For a fuller description, visit:
http://www.billohanlon.com/events/telecalls/billohanlon.html
Mind-Body Conference: Free report and great conference
NICABM (the folks who run the Psychology of Health, Immunity and Disease
Conference each year in Hilton Head) will begin to accept registrations for their upcoming December conference. I will be speaking there - it is one of my favorite conferences. This is the definitive practitioners' conference in Mind/Body Medicine and I can't recommend it highly enough.
NICABM put out a free Mind/Body Medicine Update report and quickly attracted thousands of practitioners, as did their teleseminar series. There's a good chance this year's conference will sell out - that's why I am sending this to you right away. I want to make sure you register early to secure your spot. They are giving hundreds of dollars of bonuses for the first practitioners who register. So, click the link at the end of this sentence to go to their website to secure your spot now.
Advanced Divorce Busting® Intensive Workshop
Michele Weiner-Davis, MSW
September 25-27, 2008 - Boulder, Colorado
Michele is one of my co-authors (and my friend) and has specialized in training people to prevent unnecessary divorce. She is a fun, funny and skilled workshop presenter. She has agreed to give readers of this newsletter a substantial discount for this Intensive she is giving. The usual registration fee is $795 but readers of this newsletter ("Friends of Bill") can sign up for $575, which is a substantial discount. Check out details and sign up at http://www.divorcebusting.com/Merchant2/merchant.mv?Screen=PROD&Product_Code=950Bill&Category_Code=MH&Product_Count=8
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New Online Course: How to Become a Paid Public Speaker
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Online training
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I have just finished creating a new online course helping people to become paid public speakers, something I have done as a career for the past thirty years. I have coached a number of others to get on the speaking circuit. I have offered live course but only once a year and they usually fill. Now you can take the course online at your own rate and pace and for a lot less money (the tuition is less and there is no travel cost).
Those of you who have taken or sampled my online course on How to Write a Book and Get It Published are familiar with this kind of thing. You can take the course over the course of three months, and go over it again and again. It offers everything you need to know and do to get started or expand your paid speaking career. You could be earning thousands of dollars per speech when you master this process.
I have put it on sale (usual price: $250 USD; on sale until August 31, 2008 for $200).
Check it out at: http://www.paidpublicspeaker.com/Online/page27.html
Or just purchase it by clicking on this link: Buy online Paid public speaker speaker
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Bill O'Hanlon Workshop Schedule
223 N. Guadalupe #278, Santa Fe, NM 87501 USA; www.billohanlon.comInstructions for reading this itinerary: Under the month you will find the date(s) of each workshop, the title and location of the workshop. On the second line is the sponsor's name and contact information. If you are interested in attending a particular workshop, please contact the sponsor of that workshop for a brochure or to register. Thank you! August 2008
11-15-Positive Psychology in Clinical Work; Cape Cod, MA
New England Educational Institute, NEEI, http://www.neei.org
18-24-The Possibilities Process: Breakthrough to new places in your life [Filled; next one January 19-25, 2009]; Truchas, NM
Possibilities, 505.983.2843, PossiBill@aol.comSeptember 2008
5-The Science of Happiness; San Diego, CA (American Psychotherapy Association Annual Conference)American Psychotherapy Association, 2750 E Sunshine, Springfield, MO 68504, 800-423-9737, conference@americanpsychotherapy.com; www.americanpsychotherapy.com12-Resolving Trauma Without Drama; St. Louis, MOBill Bumberry, St. John's Mercy Medical Center, 615 S. New Ballas Rd., St. Louis, MO 63141, billbumberry@charter.net26-28-Metaphors Be With You: Using Stories, Rituals, Analogies and Other Metaphorical Interventions in Changework; Whalley UKFran Burgess, Director of Training, Northern School of NLP, Whalley, ENGLAND; admin@nlpand.co.uk; www.nlpand.co.uk30/October 1-Working with Challenging Clients and Keeping your Soul Alive; Copenhagen, DENMARKHenrik Vesterhauge-Petersen, SOLUTION, www.solutionfocus.dk, tel +45 45874035, solution@solutionfocus.dkOctober 2008
3-Keeping Your Soul Alive as a Therapist; Ostersund, SWEDENMarie Forneman, Bronsaldersv. 11 83161 Ostersund, SWEDEN, marie.forneman@jll.se4/5-Positive Psychology: Practical Applications in Clinical Work; STOCKHOLM, SWEDENFramnas Skola & Terapicenter, Danderydsvagen 6, S-182 62 Djursholm, SWEDEN, fax 011+46+8.755.422.92, info@framnas.com; Ernst Salamon, Revisvorvagen 10, 120 47 Enskede Gara, SWEDEN, Tel: 011+46+8+91.30.30; ernst.salamon@bredband.net10-12-Positive Psychology: Practical Applications in Clinical Work; Santa Fe, NMNew England Educational Institute, NEEI, http://www.neei.org
27/28-Reel Love: Couples issues Through the Lens of the Movies; Toronto, ONT., CANADAMichael Kerman, Leading Edge Seminars, 88 Major St., Toronto, Ont, Canada M5S2L1; 416-964-1133; info@leadingedgeseminars.org; www.leadingedgeseminars.org
November 2008
8-Reel Love: Couples issues Through the Lens of the Movies; Albuquerque, NM
Jim Zacharias, NMAMFT, jzacharias1@gmail.com
13-Keeping Your Soul Alive (Keynote); Resolving Trauma Without Drama (3 hour presentation); Vancouver, BC, CANADA
Jack Hirose and Associates Inc., 1770 Orkney Place, North
Vancouver, BC, Canada V7H 2Z1; 604.924.0296; 1.800.456.5424; fax
604.924.0239
jackhirose@shaw.ca; www.jackhirose.com
17-21-Book Writing and Publishing Boot Camp; Santa Fe, NM
Possibilities, 505.983.2843, PossiBill@aol.com; see details at http://www.getyourbookwritten.com/publishingcourse/SantaFe.html
December 2008
8-10-Ericksonian Hypnosis (3-day intensive); Hilton Head, SC
11-Short session - Better Than Prozac: Translating the New Brain Science into Greater Clinical Results; Lunch session: How to Get More Time in Your Personal and Professional Life: The Promise of the 20-hour Workweek; Hilton Head, SC
The National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine,
6D Ledgebrook Dr., P.O. Box 523, Mansfield Center, CT 06250, 800.743.2226; 860.456.1153; fax 860.423.4512; www.nicabm.com
13-Panel: Person of the Therapist: (w/Ken Hardy, John Norcross &
Michele Weiner-Davis); Panel: Brief Therapy for Depression (w/
Christine Padesky; Janis Abrahms Spring & Michael Yapko); Clinical
Demonstration: Inclusive Therapy; 2008 Brief Therapy Conference; San
Diego, CA
14-Inclusive Therapy: A Simple and Powerful Method of Dissolving
Resistance Derived from Permissive Hypnosis and Eastern Religion;
Change 101: The Seven Ways Change Occurs in Therapy and Life; 2008
Brief Therapy Conference; San Diego, CA
The Milton H. Erickson Foundation, 3606 N. 24th Street, Phoenix, AZ 85016, 602-944-6529, www.brieftherapyconference.com
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