Copyright Notice
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Dear Readers,
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Our best lessons often come from our students. During a workshop for young adults with developmental delays, a large heavy-set young man, Lester, said very sadly and earnestly, "But, Irene, I AM fat and ugly! What good words can I say to myself about THAT?"
 "Lester, when you look at the moon," I said, "It is
sometimes a skinny moon, and sometimes a half moon, and sometimes a full round moon - but no matter what shape it is, all moons are beautiful. You could throw away the words 'fat and ugly' and say to yourself, 'I'm round like the full moon!'"
So we practiced, with my saying, "You are fat and ugly!" so that Lester could throw these words into the trash and say proudly, "I'm round and beautiful like the full moon!"
Then, for the first time that a student has asked me this question in all my years of teaching, Lester turned to me and asked, "So, Irene, what mean words do YOU say to yourself that you'd like to practice throwing away?"
Startled, I said, "Well, I don't like my squeaky voice! But what good words could I say to myself about THAT?"
Lester smiled, patted my arm, and explained kindly, "Irene, your voice says things that make people happy."
At his insistence, I practiced physically throwing away the words, "I hate my squeaky voice!" and telling myself out loud, "My voice says things that make people happy!"
And do you know what? Just as I am always reminding my students, physically practicing what to do and saying the words you need to remember out loud really does help -- because I haven't felt bad about my squeaky voice since!
Wishing each of you a joyous month,
Irene van der Zande
KIDPOWER Executive Director/Co-Founder
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Telephone Power!
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 Telephones can be a very important tool for getting help in an emergency, and children deserve to know how to get help. But most children cannot figure out how to use phones on their own. As one little boy told his mother, "I know that you should call nine-one-one in an emergency. The only problem is, I'm not sure what a nine looks like!"
With practice, children can learn how to dial cell phones, rotary phones, touch tone phones, and pay phones. They can learn how to dial 911 for emergencies, 0 to get an operator, and their own home telephone number. You can use disconnected phones to avoid making inappropriate calls and stress that their safety rule is to Check First with their adults if they can - but to call for help if someone is very sick or hurt or lost - and they cannot ask their grownup for help.
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Scream Free Parenting
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"Scream Free" is a compassionate entertaining practical program that gives families useful tools for managing their emotions and setting limits with their children so that they can get the most out of their time together. As the author Hal Edward Runkel says, "Parenting is not about kids - it's about parents!" In addition to useful materials for sale, the site has a large number of free video clips and parenting forums on different topics that help people to implement positive parenting skills into their daily lives.
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Kara Grief Support
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Whether you are setting boundaries, asking for help, or providing support, there is something tremendously empowering and healing when one knows the right words to say. Usually, the simplest words and actions are the most meaningful and effective.
Especially during times of loss or grief, many people worry about how to help each other. We don't want to be intrusive and we don't want to say something that will make things worse. We desperately want to make the other person feel better, but the best we can usually do is to help someone to feel less alone by our caring presence.
A wonderful organization called Kara Grief Support has excellent guidelines for how to help someone dealing with a loss as well as other articles. Their approach is very compatible with what we teach our instructors to do in KIDPOWER - which is to offer support without pressure, analysis, or judgment.
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WE APPRECIATE YOUR SUPPORT!
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 MANY THANKS to our hundreds of donors and volunteers. Your generosity is making a big difference in our ability to help others.
MANY
THANKS to the Corporate, Foundation, Service Club, and Government
Partners of our Central Office: Albany Lions, Allstate Foundation,
Applied Materials, Atkinson Foundation, Bank of the West, Bayer
Foundation, Big Sky Creative, Blue Shield of California Foundation,
California Endowment, Canadian International Development Agency, Castro
Valley Rotary, Citigroup Foundation, Cisco Systems Foundation, Santa Cruz Commission for the Prevention of Violence
Against Women, Community Foundation of Santa Cruz County, Community Printers of Santa Cruz, David and
Lucile Packard Foundation, The Dean and Margaret Lesher Foundation, DeAnza Lions, Deluxe Corporation Foundation,
Driscoll's Charitable Fund, East Bay Community Foundation, Ecolab,
Ephraim Foundation, Finish Line Youth Foundation,the June and Julian Foss Foundation, Freedom Rotary, Fremont Bank, Gayle's Bakery and
Rosticerria, Giant Steps Foundation, Google, Guidant, the Health Trust, Hitachi America, Ltd., Hitachi
Data Systems, Hitachi High Technologies America, Inc., Hitachi
Foundation, Insurance Industry Charitable
Foundation, In-N-Out Burger, JM Long Foundation, Kaiser Permanente,
Jean and Ed Kelly Foundation, Lowell Berry Foundation, Lucile Packard
Foundation for Children's Health, CTB/McGraw-Hill, Mechanics Bank,
Mervyn's, Omega Nu, Peninsula Community Foundation, Plantronics, Porter
Sesnon Foundation, Arnie Kamrin of PPi Technologies Global, Radio
Shack, Rite Aid Foundation, Ruddie Memorial Youth Foundation, Russell
Investment Group, Safeway, San Lorenzo Valley Rotary, San Francisco Foundation,
Santa Cruz Medical Clinic, Scotts Valley Lions, Scotts Valley Rotary,
Seagate, Sharpdots.com, Silicon Valley Community
Foundation, SmithMicro, Sonora Area Foundation, Staples
Foundation for Learning, Special Hope Foundation, Target Stores, Tides Foundation, Tuolumne
County First 5 Commission, TRIO Foundation, Union Bank of California, Union City Lions,
Wayne and Gladys Valley Foundation, Verizon, Vodaphone, Waste
Management, Wells Fargo Foundation, West Marine, and the Y. & H.
Soda Foundation.
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