Promising Stability in a Disposable World

Benedictine Sisters of St. Mary Monastery, Rock Island, Illinois

March 2009

Benedictine Sisters monastery grounds at St. Mary Monastery, Rock Island, Ill

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Discerning your path in life

Promising Stability in a Disposable World

Everyone knows what stability is, right? It's the fourth leg of a table, or dinner on the table night after night. It's tradition that has not been broken or callously thrown away. You can look at the second promise of our Benedictine monastic profession the same way.

"Stability is our promise to live the Benedictine life together, in this community," Prioress Phyllis McMurray, OSB, says. "It's not easy in today's disposable world. It requires both celibacy and monastic poverty. Celibacy enables us to devote all of our time and energy as Christ, in the service of one another and others. Monastic poverty enables us to live simply, balancing our wants and needs. We share all we have with one another."

Could you promise such stability? Read what our newest members think about it, below.

Postulant Jackie Walsh, who entered in September, 2008:

"We are here seeking God, not independently but as a community. We support each other in joy, sadness, success and challenge. We pray together and share a table together. We live the Gospel as the foundation from which we move forward on our journey.

"I lived simply before I came here. I'm not a clutterbug. I feel I have all I need. One thing that changed for me, though, is, I'm a card freak. It was nothing for me to go into a card shop and buy 20 bucks worth of cards for my friends. I don't do that anymore. I don't have the money! But I like writing letters, so I do that.

"Simplicity is a balancing act. It's a balance between our ministries and our prayer life. Celibacy helps promote that as well. It allows us to devote ourselves 100 percent to others. We don't have the exclusive relationships that you do in marriages. We can devote our whole lives to God and God's people.

"We are all here seeking God by choice with our Sisters. When everyone has the same purpose, it gives you the bond of family. It lends a very stable foundation."

Novice Stefanie MacDonald, who entered in September, 2007:

"Stability means two big things to me. First, it means we are committed to one group of people for the single purpose of seeking God. Second, it means perseverance, because, as in any relationship, things aren't always going to be easy.

"As an introvert, it takes me a while to develop relationships and confidence within them. The promise of stability allows time for that to happen. It has given me a level of security and comfort that I don't have to be perfect for my Sisters to love and accept me. I can admit when I'm having trouble with something and we can talk about it without my feeling threatened.

"That said, living with 60 other women can mean you might feel judged - even if they're not judging you at all. For example, it's very hard for me to get to Lauds on time, especially during the school year when I'm teaching. I'm not a morning person!

"In our disposable society, we are accustomed to packing up and leaving whenever things aren't perfect. We leave our homes and neighborhoods and jobs. No matter what happens in this monastic community, I'm staying. Easy or hard.

"Living in community challenges me and stretches me. Stability strengthens the relationships we have with one another, allowing that to happen. Benedict had it exactly right."

Postulant Nancy Offenhiser, who entered in November, 2008:

"Bloom where you are planted: you know the old saw. Yet I think as Benedictines that is exactly what we are called to do. We are the seed that fell on good soil (Mt 13:8). All of us monastics are called to this. The Rule provides good soil for us.

"We are called to be a witness today in our fast-paced world to a different way of life. The quiet, deliberate way of monasticism honors our deepest self.

"Benedict had no patience with the transient who never settled down. Those who would go from place to place and never settle down were, in his judgment, slaves to their own wills and gross appetites (RB 11).

"Living under a Prioress and a Rule in community challenges our deepest selves. We are challenged to grow in love and humility, service to each other and the world, obedience to each other and God. We could not do these things without the soil that stability provides."