"You don't love me," he said. "I do love you," she replied. "I just want to love less of you."
People working in state government aren't feeling the love and don't see their numbers, wages and benefits as being extra weight. But many in the public do.
Mistakenly, some in the public have made it personal, particularly in the blogosphere. They don't distinguish between the employees and the union. They also don't place the blame where it belongs, on legislators and governors who overpromised during years of contract negotiations.
In the battle of the bulge, the state employees' new union leader is trying to rally his troops by making the fight equally personal.
"My father worked for DOT for 36 years. Anyone who wants to criticize state workers, in my opinion, is criticizing my father, so I take it very personally," Chris Quint, the Maine State Employee Association's new executive director, said in a Kennebec Journal interview. "For me, it's a battle between good and evil,"
It seems this is the beginning of a public relations campaign in which Quint wants the public to see only black and white; just good guys and bad guys.
If this misguided debate is allowed to continue, we will never talk about the essential changes that government needs to undertake in support of a more prosperous state. We will continue fighting a war of attrition in which everyone is certain to lose something and gain very little.
The fact is that no one has escaped the pinch of the recession, including state workers.
To preserve state jobs, the union accepted unpaid furlough days in hopes they would be restored as the economy improved. Quint is optimistic about that scenario:
"If you look at the most recent revenue numbers, we're going to be $50 million in the black. I think that's a positive sign as we enter into executive branch contract negotiations this year. Hopefully, we can get some good things in the next contract for them."
Unfortunately, his rosy outlook doesn't acknowledge a billion-dollar structural gap in the upcoming state budget in which state employee salaries and benefits are a contributing factor.
So, let's at least agree that government has a vital role in a civil society. We rely on our public employees to do a good job with public safety, service delivery and oversight. They should be compensated fairly and recognized for their important contributions.
At what point, however, do the public interest and the union interest diverge?
The conflict begins when the public interest collides with job security. That's where we are today.
The public understands that we cannot afford nearly 20,000 well-compensated state employees in a poor and economically stagnant state.
But it is not the union's job to prioritize the services of state government. That's for the politicians to decide. The union's job is jobs. And if the union saves your job, you keep paying your dues.
With those dues in hand, the union plans to get more for its members through the Legislature by electing a union-friendly majority. Quint said the Maine State Employees Association (and its national affiliate, the Service Employees International Union) will be very active.
"For us, the governor's race is important, but the Legislature is just as important," he said.
This approach is not about what makes sense for the public interest, however. It's about gaining power and influence with legislators.
It's also about electing the other side of the table for your contract negotiations. Voters should take note that an endorsement from the union comes with high expectations.
But if it turns out that the voters choose a majority who favor the public interest over saving union jobs, the conversation must also include reasonable severance packages if positions are to be eliminated.
State government should behave as well as the very best private-sector employer when it comes to treating laid-off workers fairly.
It's a small price for a better long-term outcome. It also shows respect to those who have faithfully served the public with the best of intentions.
As a new leader, Quint can act as a transformative figure in labor negotiations. He can come to the table as a problem solver with the public interest in mind while seeking higher wages for fewer positions.
He also can help find net savings for taxpayers from a shiny, fast and more efficient government.
It's time we thank our state employees, give new thinking a test-drive and move forward in the public interest.
What do you think and what are you going to do about it? Contact your local legislative candidates (link below) and find out where they stand on this and other issues.