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Michael Fox CPCC,
founder of m�agine!,
is a professional
coach and trainer,
author and creative artist, whose work has been featured throughout
the world.
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Authentic community:
where "solitude greets solitude"...
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We are called to the table as community, not as individuals. We are called to live together in communities of faith and commitment. Without community, we become self-centered, self-willed, self-reliant--selfish. Spiritual formation always includes life in community--wherever and however community might appear in our lives.
Authentic community is formed--as twentieth-century
writer Henri Nouwen described it--when solitude greets solitude.* For only in solitude can we come to know that we are vulnerable and broken, and yet the beloved of God. If we first try to create community, we are going to expect that the community will make us feel beloved, will give us that perfect, unconditional love--that love that only God can satisfy, the divine love of which human love is a mere echo. Authentic community is not created when loneliness grabs loneliness; authentic community is formed when solitude greets solitude. In solitude we realize, as the beloved of God, that we are one among the sons and daughters of God, and that we want to be with our family.
Life in community, living as family, can be difficult. Sometimes we feel close and that is lovely; sometimes we don't feel much love and that is difficult.
Nouwen observed: "Sometimes in community I put claims on people
that are so high that nobody can live up to them-emotional claims and
expectations of which I am not fully aware. I expect someone to take
away my loneliness. I expect that person to give me a sense of
at-homeness. I expect that when we live together, everything will be
joyful and pleasant. I expect the community always to be a peaceful
living together with no hard work or conflict. When my expectations are
not realized, I am left feeling upset, lonely, and depressed...As people
who have hearts that long for perfect love, we have to forgive one
another for not being able to give or receive that perfect love in our
everyday lives...What needs to be forgiven? We need to forgive one
another for not being God!" [Nouwen, Spiritual
Direction, pp. 118-120].
Regardless of its difficulty, we can be faithful to one another and thereby create a home. We can forgive one another for offering limited expressions of unlimited love; we can celebrate one anothers' gifts as lowly but lovely reflections of God's abundant mercy and grace. In community, we can declare to one another, "You are the beloved of God. With you I am well pleased."
Who is in your faith community? What binds you together?
What makes your community a challenge?
Who do you need to forgive for not being God?
How might the following statement show up in you:
"Let our words be few; let our lives loom large."
*This week's article was adapted from Nouwen's Spiritual Direction
*� 2006 by the Estate of Henri J.M. Nouwen,
*� Michael J. Christensen,
*� Rebecca J. Laird
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Michael Fox
m�agine!
530/613.2774
P.O. Box 9144
Auburn, CA, USA 95604
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In addition to personal and professional coaching,
m�agine! specializes in spiritual transformation coaching,
employing its proprietary models: Values, Vision, Voice and Heart, Soul, Mind & Strength.
Michael's books include Complete in Christ,
Complete in Christ Spiritual Transformation Workbook, and Biblio�files.
Coaching fees are based upon a sliding scale. Contact us for details.
Limited scholarships are available for spiritual transformation coaching.
On the flip side, if you are able, please inquire about opportunities
to fund scholarships for those who cannot afford coaching fees.
View our archives!
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