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Winterfest! Justice in the Snow
January 22 Brattleboro, VT
February 5
Brunswick, ME
Snow date for either day above
is February 12 in Exeter, NH
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AUUA Chapter Meeting
February 8
Laconia, NH
June 14
Portsmouth, NH
RPM (Religious Educators, Presidents & Ministers)
March 5 Manchester, NH
March 19
Saco, ME
April 16
Woodstock, VT
Registration form
Spring Conference & Annual Meeting of the Northern New England District of the Unitarian Univeralist Association
April 1-2 at the Red Jacket Inn, North Conway, NH
More details available soon!
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Bringing Unitarian Universalism Home - December 2010 |
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Taking It Home
Rev. Mary Higgins, District Executive
 OK, you have found me out! I find some of the deepest inspiration and profound reason for the work I do in our district and in our larger UUA to be my grandchildren: It is also important to honor receipt of my Unitarian Universalist tradition from my parents and one set of my grandparents as well. I have five grandchildren and they keep this faith connected to something terribly real, but it is not the future: It is the present: This very moment. My past and my present are creating this moment: The only moment we have to create.
I marvel at what I have to learn to live in these current times. I was handed a gift from my Mom and Dad as to the relevance of doubt in religious questions, self reflection on the role I played in all the events of my life; both positive and negative, and the central role of family and religious community to the stability of the universe I inhabit.
My parent's and many of those in their generation were loyal institutionalists even when they disagreed with certain policies. They loved much of what happened in their church and much of what happed in their lives but were the harshest critics of the unjust. They supported their church and even when my Mom knew she was within days of her death, one of her last acts was to pay her annual pledge to her church because she had promised to do so. It felt simple to me as I grew up. There was a way of honor and way that was not honorable: discerning which was our task as children of our family, church, country and world.
As I cleaned out the file cabinets after Mom and Dad had died, I found the list of the people my parents supported came from nearly every state in the union. They felt they needed to care for the politics of the whole country because one person could not make all the difference they wanted to without partners. Mom and Dad were not rich people but amazing citizens of their country and their town, (maybe your town) and their church. I learned early from them that you could still love an organization, party, family member even when they disappointed you. You could still offer support and care without losing yourself in the process. It was a call from deep within them and it was handed to us as holy.
I talk now with my grandchildren on the phone and we have book club together and talk about friendship, how to keep your center when your friends are wanted exclusivity from you as their friend. We talk values and how hard it is when values collide. We do a lot of temperature taking to see what feels right. We talk about justice and racism. We talk about the joy of the earth and the trickster among us. We have the "Oldest Daughters' Club" including my daughter, daughter-in-law and two granddaughters and of the particular responsibilities of that role in family life. We share the "cone of silence" occasionally and we promise safety there to ask the tough questions and get real answers. These kids teach me to open my heart and I promise them that broken hearts can mend. We need each other so much. Life can be so difficult. Without the multigenerational perspective that can be brought to bear we might not know the ways that allow us to lighten our loads and reframe the questions of our lives. We need for the older, the younger, the same aged people to be with us and to be asking similar questions to combine the wisdom of the ages, the vision of the fresh, the sameness and the difference of the realities we face so we are all better. I do not think multigenerational faith is about adults giving faith to children as much as it is about all of us interacting in myriad ways to find the struggle, the hope and wisdom to enter the world with all the perspectives of the ages in our hearts and heads. We need the longevity of the elder to remind us that we can heal, forgive and love again more strongly. We adults need the joy and wonder of the child to pull us back from the brink of cynicism; we need to share the endurance manifest in each human spirit to keep us whole.
Each age is a rare and precious gift to the others. Each life has similarities and differences that bring it into focus and help provide its meaning: If we know this we are the richest spiritual beings on earth. If we embody this perspective in our churches and societies, we create the crucible for healing, justice and for love to transform despair to hope and injustice to peace. At this holiday time, may this be so.
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Multigenerational Ministry: Bringing It Home
Kimberly Paquette, Multigenerational Ministry Director
 One of my family's favorite parts of attending church each week is our tradition alled "Joys and Concerns". In this moment, people are invited to the front of the sanctuary to light a candle of joy or concern, and briefly share some words with the community. In these moments, we feel connected to each other as we hear about love and loss, the trials and tribulations of life, and the everyday moments which make life what it is.
Some years ago, we took that tradition home. Every now and again, we will sit down as a family, around a small tray of candles. I will light the large pillar in the center, and there are smaller tea-lights around the tray. After a brief moment of silence, we take turns lighting a candle, and share with each other the things we are feeling really good about, and the things that we are worrying about as well. We have this great opportunity to really be able to share how we are feeling, and each person has the chance to be genuinely heard. That is not always the case during our day to day activities. My kids have shared some feelings that I wonder if I would have been able to key into had we not shared that time together.
Lighting our own candles of "Joys and Concerns" as a family allows us to reconnect and take the needed step back to pause. There is something peaceful about sitting quietly, staring at the flickering flames of the candles and being in the company of loved ones that is truly spiritual.
"Learning how to become emotionally literate is one of the best investments that human beings can make for themselves, their children, and the future." ~ Ayman Sawaf
Many congregations are beginning to implement curricula from the UUA's new Tapestry of Faith program. One of the highlights of these curricula is the Taking it Home sections. Each lesson has a piece for families to take home with concrete ideas for further discussion, experiences, and faith in action. The best part is that these Taking it Home sections are available and accessible on line to EVERYONE! This is a great resource for families to deepen their discussion and practice of Unitarian Universalism at home. You can find all of the Tapestry of Faith curricula, lessons, and Taking it Home sections here:
Each Taking it Home section includes:
IN TODAY'S SESSION...an overview of the lesson
EXPLORE THE TOPIC TOGETHER. Talk about...questions to ask and discuss as a family.
EXTEND THE TOPIC TOGETHER. Try... games, ritual and activities to share
FAMILY DISCOVERY... resources for further discovery
Here is one example of a family ritual from the Creating Home curriculum:
Faith home meets family home.
Try a week of evening rituals related to chalice-lighting.
You can use a chalice, a candle, an LED/battery-operated chalice light, or the stained glass chalice your child made in this session. Use any words you like as a blessing as you light the chalice. You may like to use these words, which your child heard during the chalice-making activity:
The chalice is a symbol of the Unitarian Universalist tradition. It is a symbol for love, freedom, community, and light.
You may wish to help your child light the chalice him/herself.
Include some discussion each evening about the roles faith and your faith home play in your family life.
Here are some questions you may use. There is one for each day:
Day 1 - What is our faith home and why do we attend there?
Day 2 - How is our faith home connected to our family home?
Day 3 -Where do we see circles in the world? What do the circles mean?
Day 4 - Why is the flaming chalice a symbol of our faith home?
Day 5 - What might be a personal faith symbol for each of us?
Day 6 - How can we, as Unitarian Universalists, make a difference in the world?
Day 7 - Where do we learn the most about our faith community?
UUA Tapestry of Faith - Taking It Home |
The "Uh-Oh ness" of Bringing our UU Identity Home
Rev. Karen Brammer, Small Church Specialist
 Poetic license or peculiar mind, I moved from 'Bringing Home' to 'Hitting Home'. When something 'hits too close to home' we know something is not okay. Uh-oh.
Like it or not, there are times when bringing our UU identity home brings on the "uh-oh ness" of something hitting too close to home.
Here is one example. Unless you are two years old, having to say 'no' to something can bring on feelings of "uh-oh ness". When that something is a person's behavior, especially in a small congregation, we are particularly challenged. If our identity hinges on connection and relationship, why would we do anything that seemed to counter feeling kind, caring, and inclusive?
My response? Bringing our UU identity home compels us.
One thing that gets in the way of congregations of all sizes bringing our full UU identity home is individualism gone astray. We live in a culture that has upheld individual rights over the collective. For probably good reasons, we UUs in the Northeast particularly value the importance of the individual, sometimes at the expense of 'we'.
Our UU identity challenges us to work this tension between "I" and "We". It is worth asking, is there something the congregation avoids saying 'no' to that keeps us from bringing our full UU identity home? Do not be dismayed if your congregation struggles with this. You are not alone. This is a culture shift for us all.
Our UU principles begin with the inherent dignity and worth of the individual but just as important are the principles that uphold a deep search for truth, learning honorable democratic process, creating a community of peace and justice, and living in conscious relationship with all of creation. Bringing my UU identity home compels me to work honestly, sometimes joyfully and usually daily, with the tensions between these powerful and competing principles.
Bringing our UU identity to our NNED home is nothing less than learning to live with those tensions. We are, all of us, learning how to compassionately hold boundaries and learning to be genuinely curious about something or someone that is beyond our understanding. It is a times not comfortable. Who goes to church to be uncomfortable? But it is of great value.
We can value that hard work even as we share stories, play, help one another, and enter worshipful space. I am thrilled and honored that many of our congregations have with understandable trepidation, and with clarity of conviction, committed themselves to bring our more full UU identity home. |
Invitations into the Paradoxes
Rev. Pat Hoertdoerfer, NNED Ministry to and with Elders
 Our Unitarian Universalists heritage asks us to dwell in the paradoxes of our faith - balancing freedom, reason and tolerance with faith, hope and love. These are the trademarks of our faith: to recognize the inherent good in all persons which encourages us to extend love to all people (Universalist) as well as to celebrate the right of conscience and the authority of reason in our search for truth and meaning (Unitarian). Our faith invites us into the paradox of respecting our whole self - mind, body, heart and spirit - and building a beloved community of peace and justice.
As we age one of the most important invitations is living the paradox of doing and being. The first half of our lives is driven by the energy of eros - the "doing and producing" energy. We prove ourselves to the world. We work and create families. We are productive members of society. In fact, our doing helps us in significant ways to form our identity. We live in a culture that emphasizes doing.
As we move into the second half of life, we enter the being phase of our life. Our energy shifts and we enter the energy of thanatos. This is a moving-inward energy, a reflective energy. It invites us to go deeper into ourselves - to integrate all of who we are - to become whole and to prepare for dying. It is an energy that we have not always allowed ourselves to experience. Certainly we are invited to be present to this sense of being during times of Sabbath, most often in worship, prayer and meditation. As we age, however, our bodies and spirits cooperate inviting us to slow down, be quiet, and reflect on the meaning of our lives.
In an article Maturing with Soul: Elders Giving the Gift of Being, James Henry states, "Being is a lot more complicated than doing. Being involves coming into a relationship with that which is invisible, that which we cannot see or touch and cannot fully know."
It is a time of senescence or ripening claims William W. Thomas in his book, What Are Old People For? How Elders Will Save the World. He defines elderhood as a way of living beyond adulthood, a way of being in a world that puts receptivity, quality, feelings, relationships and meaning-making ahead of doing.
Since turning 65 myself, I recognize the challenge of elderhood as a time to discover inner richness for harvesting the wisdom of life experience and spiritual growth. In growing our soul, we elders must face our mortality and that is just as important as preparation for a career or family. It is from this time of inner growth that elders become sages, healers and mentors of the generations to follow.
As elders we are becoming our true selves. Do the elders in your life and in your congregation fill any of the following roles?
- Celebrants celebrating life by maintaining a sense of humor, harvesting what they have sown over a long lifetime, and affirming others through unconditional positive regard.
- Wisdom keepers actively learning and growing, sharing their life experiences with people of all ages, and facing their mortality with dignity and wisdom.
- Conservationists viewing all life as interconnected and taking care of others and the Earth.
- Mentors synthesizing wisdom from life experience and formulating this into a legacy for future generations, discovering hidden wellsprings of healing, and empowering others in peacemaking and justice building.
In this winter season let us enter the dark fully and celebrate the return of the light. It is a wonderful time for each of us to enter the paradox of doing and being and to discover where we are on that spectrum. Take Unitarian Universalist Sabbath time to reflect on your blessings of love and to engage the holiday celebrations with peace, hope and joy. |
Bringing That Rascally 7th Principle Home
Holly Zadra, First Universalist Church of Pittsfield, Maine
Regional Sustainability Task Force
 Bring up the words "environmental sustainability and justice" in almost any group, and, inevitably, you arrive at unshakable passion created with what make group dynamics most difficult, namely, heartbreak, anger, frustration and the knowledge of humanity's historical and ongoing lack of sustainability and justice. And, more often than not, that passion is coupled with what activists thrive on, what drives others to drink too much coffee in the morning and something worse at night, and what many parents feel when they consider the world in which their children are growing: the often overwhelming question of what to do and how.
Which is what the NNED Sustainability Task Force struggles with while working toward integrating that rascally 7th principle into our lives, homes, churches and communities. For "Respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part" comes with questions, commitments, ongoing awareness and a willingness to connect spiritual practice with environmental consciousness. And it requires inclusion - and not just the newts and loons, wetlands and seas.
The trouble is that selfsame passion that motivates rectifying action often comes at the expense of inclusion. Arming ourselves against an enemy, be it a corporate thief, a certain republican senator, or perhaps even a member of our own community, group or family, we exonerate ourselves, casting responsible onto someone else's shoulders.
Which is why this month's theme of "Bringing Unitarian Universalism Home" is especially pertinent. It does more than ask us to consider the principles of Unitarian Universalism; it asks us to consider home.
What is home? Maybe it's protection, respite, sustenance and the occasional scolding that transforms wrong action or speech into right. Maybe home is a place, a memory, family and friends, or maybe it is something we seek, but have not yet found. Home has many and divergent meanings for each of us just as it is composed of many and divergent members that are often in direct opposition to one another.
In the end, home is where sustainability and environmental justice lead us if we but remember the lessons home teaches. Home is where we expect to be nurtured in one sense or another, where we learn life skills, where respect and cooperation are the structural, social, and economic building blocks, and where common wealth for all is the obligation - even for those with whom we disagree.
So when we bring home the 7th principle, we bring home the Christian Coalition and exploitive industrialists. Along with our progressive brethren, we bring home homophobes and dictators. For we are all a part of the same family, and we are all looking for that elusive place called home. |
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A Multigenerational Trip to DC
Monica Staples, Member & Youth Adviser
UU Church of Nashua, NH
This is a photo of the group from the UU Church of Nashua that went to the Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear in Washington DC on Saturday, October 30th. We left from the church at about 10 pm on Friday, October 29th and drove throughout the night to Washington, DC. We arrived at about 6:30 in the morning. Since the rally didn't for a while, a bunch of groups went sight seeing. The Rally itself was an amazing experience. In a world that can be so divided, it was great to see so many people (I've heard estimates of between 200,000 to 250,000 people) of all different ages and diverse backgrounds coming together to try and bring some sanity and civility back to politics. After the rally we had some more time to try and find something to eat in a place that wasn't too crowded. Around 7pm, we posed for this picture, and then got back on the bus and traveled again back to Nashua, arriving at around 4:30 in the morning. It took me a few days to catch up on the sleep I missed, but it was well worth it! |
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