Northern Lights, newsletter of the Northern New England District

NNED logo in box NorthernLights-big

The newsletter of the Northern New England District of the Unitarian Universalist Association

Fall, 2010

In This Issue

Being Unitarian Universalist...

Sharing UU Identity

A Faith Worthy of Our Commitment and Generosity

Why was the Church Office Closed?

Chalice Lighter Program

Save the Dates

Quick Links

NNED Website

District Staff

The Unitarian Universalist Association of Congregations

Our Neighboring Districts:

Mass Bay/Clara Barton

Ballou Channing

Greetings!

Welcome to the first issue of the Northern New England District's electronic newsletter, Northern Lights.

It is with hearts full of gratitude that we say good-bye to our wonderful newsletter editor, Joy Wallens-Penford. She has served this district and our faith with an eye toward integrating the form and the message and making them both excellent. She has designed our logo, edited our crazy paragraphs rendering them understandable, and only been mildly annoyed when deadlines passed and she did not have everything she needed to meet her deadlines. It has been a joy, Joy, and we thank you.

Rev. Mary Higgins, District Executive, for the entire NNED Staff and all who have contributed to Northern Lights over the past years.

Being Unitarian Universalist

Rev. Mary Higgins, District Executive

This year we are going to focus our articles thematically each time we write to you in our Northern Lights newsletter. This issue we will talk about UU identity and what it is and maybe what it is not.

I had a conversation the other day with one of my Unitarian Universalist cohorts. During the course of the conversation, she said to me that if Unitarian Universalism did not suit her, she would just move on: I was struck by that statement, though not at all defensive. I suddenly realized, that for me, "moving on" has never been an option. You will notice the title for this article is not about being "a" UU but about something much more profound for me. It is about being Unitarian Universalist. For me, "being UU" is an anchor: a foundation, an aspiration on which to pivot when I go about the daily rituals and routines of being human. It is not about being better than anyone in the universe, but is a call to a deep relationship between my values and dreams with the reality of my life.

Being UU holds out a standard of conduct and challenge to me. When I go home after a long day, I always ask myself, "Have I slipped up today and failed to honor someone with the integrity I hope to bring to all my interactions?" I ask that of myself often: Sometimes the answer is "I think today I did OK." Other times I know I have failed to be true to my side of the covenant to bring respect to all our interactions, and I am ashamed. My commitment to this faith tradition, in all its vagaries and in all its imperfection, coupled with my own beautiful and flawed humanity, is in constant conversation.

Commitment and action, which reflect the values I have held dear all my life, are not alterable just because I do not like a piece of what is going on either here inside me or out there in the larger world. Life is a dialogue between the ideal I hold for myself and my interactions with the reality of what I find when I try to practice those ideals. The ideal gives me a foundation against which to hold myself accountable and the reality keeps me very humble. The ideals I use as benchmarks are those given to me in Unitarian Sunday School classes as a small child and ever since in our congregations. The ideal that stands out most for me right now is how critical it is to welcome the other as a gift. That particular value has taught me so very much. I am not complete without knowing how many different ways the world occurs to others than it does to me. I was usually the "stranger" in our churches growing up as my family moved thirteen times before I graduated from high school. Many times I entered the room as the new person, so I know at a core level how important it is to open our hearts to the new and unknown rather than excluding the other: To do this is a process, and a practice. Those who find the courage to stay open and do this well are faith practitioners of the first order. The gifts I receive when I can stay with this openness cause me to experience a sense of invincibility. I fly high for days after exchanges with the new, and often the frightening truths I learn from you.

"Being UU" is not a choice for me, for our highest values are my constant companions: Those values are good enough friends not to let me walk out on my faith when the going gets tough. They would walk out with me and then I would lack the community of challenge to help me grow. Walking out would create an isolation that is not acceptable when I am on the lifelong journey trying to fulfill the call to find my humanity and fulfill the purpose for my life.

This brings me to one area I think may be so difficult for Unitarian Universalists to practice and that is "to forgive ourselves and others and begin again in love." I know that there is a high moment that often comes when we think of the joy, luck, perseverance and happenstance that brings us into this religious community. We often experience something powerful that makes us feel as if we had finally found "home." This experience has some of our folks believe that they have found the fountain of truth and are above others. The inevitable fall from the mountaintop of our surety comes when we realize that being UU is a daily process of striving, achieving, failing, succeeding, celebrating, loving and forgiving. There is a lifetime of engagement ahead of us as UU people of faith that does not let us go. I am "caught" by this faith and it serves me well. Being "caught" does not keep me from falling over and over again, but by the ways people hold out a hand to help me stand upright again.

Identity is not a negotiable part of me no matter how hard the challenges are, how many times I attempt the good and fail, or what is going on in the larger world around me. It is as much a part of me as my arms and legs and I am grateful for what this faith has given me. I am UU watch me roar! How about you?

Sharing UU Identity

Kimberly Paquette, Multigenerational Ministry Director

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In my experiences as both a Religious Educator and Montessori teacher, I have come to respect the journey of self discovery. I have facilitated learning opportunities for children and youth to learn independently, and be self-taught. I encourage children to develop their own thoughts, opinions, and hypotheses when problem solving. All too often I have responded to a child's question by asking, "Well, what do you think?" I ask that so the child can form the habit of thinking things through, or seeking alternate ways of finding answers to their questions. Lately, I've found that this mode of "teaching" just isn't working out so well.

For instance, my daughter asks me, "What do we believe?" I travel my normal route of questioning and she articulates her own version and understanding of our principles. Great! She continues, "Are we Christian? My friends are Christian, but I don't know if we are?" Hmmm....I'm not sure I can get around this one by asking her to think it through. I haphazardly fumble along discussing the differences between living Christian values and dedicating your life to Jesus Christ, or seeing the Bible as a book of moral stories and seeing it as an historical text. I can see she's not buying it. She wants answers.

Unitarian Universalism is a creedless faith, which can make defining it more than challenging for the best of us. Articulating our faith and recognizing our UU identity can be a struggle for members of all ages. For some of our families, parents find themselves discovering Unitarian Universalism with their children, and are still trying to answer the questions for themselves. We tread lightly so as not to indoctrinate our children, encouraging them to embark on their own search for truth and meaning. Michelle Richards writes:

Sharing personal religious and spiritual beliefs with children is not indoctrination; it is offering the guidance they eagerly seek until they are developmentally ready to decide for themselves. If children receive vague and confusing answers time and again when they ask about spiritual and theological issues, they'll eventually stop asking and start looking for answers elsewhere. But many of the other people your children may encounter in life will not be so hesitant to pass on their religious beliefs, opening up the possibility that the vacuum you've left will be filled by others who are seeking to indoctrinate them.

http://blogs.uuworld.org/parenting/2010/03/01/sharing-beliefs-is-not-indoctrination/

A Faith Worthy of Our Commitment and Generosity

Laurel Amabile

As a child growing up in a Unitarian Universalist family in a small church in Maine, I understood my faith tradition as one rooted in the Christian teachings of love and caring for one another in a community where everyone was needed and valued and treated with respect. My
mother was in the choir. My father rang the church bell and served as greeter and usher. My two brothers and I attended every Sunday, our white envelopes in hand to give our weekly offering when the plate was passed. My mother's family members had been active in the church for three generations and were central to the life of the congregation.

In my adolescent and young adult years, I drifted away a bit under the
pull of my other social, academic, and work activities. However, I came back into the UU church to be married and looked to the community to provide my children religious education. The church and its people have always been there for me. It didn't take long for me to find ways to get involved, to give back to the congregation that had nurtured me and my family for now five generations. I got involved in committee and religious education programs, and new horizons continuously opened up for learning, service, and contributing my time, energy and resources.

I am deeply grateful for all that Unitarian Universalism has brought to
my life and my family. Over the years, I have responded to the calling
to act upon my UU beliefs and live out the principles and values.

Ours is an expansive and inclusive faith tradition, one that is dynamic
and changing and challenges our thinking. Unitarian Universalism
invites us to join our hearts and our resources as stewards of the faith
community. Each and every one of us is needed to create the kind of
faith community worthy of our greatest commitment and generosity.

With Gratitude and Best wishes,

Laurel

Laurel Amabile, Director, Annual Program Fund,

Stewardship and Development Office, UUA

AUUA Chapter Meeting

(or, Why Was the Church Office Closed?)

Lea Smith, Church Administrator, Second Congregational Church Unitarian Universalist, Concord, NH

Administrators Mtg in Burlington VT

From left to right: Judy Buswell, UU Society of Laconia, NH; Joy Blanchette, NNED Administrator; Lea Smith, Second Congregational Society UU, Concord, NH; Brian Dustin, UU Church of Saco and Biddeford in Saco, ME; Julie Slayton Frank, UU Church in Portsmouth, NH; Kathleen Kemp, First UU Society in Burlington, VT; Nita Hanson,

Champlain Valley UU Society in Middlebury, VT.

On Tuesday, October 5, UU administrators gathered at the UU Society in Burlington, VT for a meeting of our District's chapter of the Association of UU Administrators (AUUA.) Administrators in our District meet three times annually to learn from one another and from outside presenters. The Burlington administrative staff, Kathleen Kemp and Christina Fulton, organized a program on church safety, and invited an officer from the Burlington police department to talk to us. We covered topics such as preventing theft and robbery, responding to mentally ill or transient people, lockdown procedures, and educating our congregation about church safety. During lunch, we enjoyed a tour of the historic Burlington church, gleaning tidbits to take home such as bulletin board ideas, inspiration from their beautiful children's library, even coping skills for building crises! In the afternoon we shared some of our best practices for use and administration of the Ministers Discretionary Fund, and we learned about AUUA Professional Days at General Assembly from two administrators who attended it, Julie Slayton Frank of South Church in Portsmouth, and Nita Hanson of the Champlain Valley UU Society. While it may be inconvenient to have your church office closed for AUUA meetings, the value our churches gain from this knowledge-sharing is immeasurable.

NNED Chalice Lighter Program

Rev. Eleanor Rice, Chalice Lighter Committee Chair

goldChalice

The Chalice Lighter Program has started an exciting third year. We had five applications for Chalice Lighter Grants to consider this fall! It
was a very difficult decision, but we've selected the First Universalist Parish of Chester, VT as the recipient of a Major Grant. Chester has
turned themselves around from a few years ago, growing from 25 to 79 members, and has embarked on a major building renovation including full handicap accessibility to their historic stone building. The Call letter will go out soon and will also be posted on the NNED website. Also on the website, you will find other resources to use: a Basic Chalice Lighter Poster, the most recent Chalice Lighter Poster, the How We Do It Poster, the Chalice Lighter Brochure and Enrollment Forms. The number of Chalice Lighters willing to support this program continues to grow ... slowly. If we could double the number of Chalice Lighters, our Major Grants would grow to $10,000! We hope you will make use of some of the resources to encourage your members to join in helping another congregation take a leap of faith. Together, we can spread the light of Unitarian Universalism!

Save the Dates - 2011!

date book