Holidays
In case you're not aware, this week in the US it will be Thanksgiving.
�Soon after, it will be Christmas. �In the past few months, there's
also been Eid al-Fitr, the festival at the end of the Muslim month of
Ramadan and Diwali, the Hindu festival of lights. Chanukah, the Jewish
festival also known as the festival of lights is coming up.
There's two ways to treat these observances. �You can fit them all
into 'Happy Holidays' and denigrate the importance of them to others.
Or you can be respectful of their family traditions and treat each
observance individually. �The second, we suggest, is better.
These traditions are so important to most of us, that the details matter. Many of us have had the experience of celebrating one of these
observances with a friend or more distant family member. �I asked a
friend last year how her Christmas dinner was and she said 'it was
fine, but we always have roast potatoes, and they have mash. �It isn't
quite the same'. �If it's important enough to you, you remember the details. Trust us when we say, other people remember details of their traditions too. These observances are personal, important, worth of notice and attention.
When we talk about communication, we say that the quality of our
communication is judged partly by it's relevance to us. �If someone's
talking about something we're not interested in, we don't think of
that as quality communication. �If you want your communication with
someone to be high quality, talk about the things that are important
to them - such as the details of their celebrations.
You don't need to become an expert on every religion or cultural
observance. �You do need to show interest when someone says 'my family
is getting together for ...'. �There's no shame in saying 'I don't
know what that is, would you mind telling me a little more?'. �You can
also ask 'how do I give you good wishes for this event?' � No one
we've ever asked that question has ever said it's rude to ask, or been
offended.
We don't want to make assumptions about people's religious beliefs,
culture or family traditions, or their willingness to talk about them.
�We do want to show interest when they mention them. �It's part of
developing relationships, and deeper relationships make everything
easier.
Annual
Reviews
As many
companies are coming up to their annual review period, we thought we'd
remind you of our podcasts on preparing for reviews. For managers we
have: creating
the performance reviews and delivering
them. For individual contributors we have preparing
for your review.
We also
have some additional casts for different contexts such as if you've
only been in your role for a short time or you're in a matrix. All our
performance review casts can be found here.
If you have a situation that's not addressed, come to the forums and
let us know what the situation is. Between the Manager Tools team and
the member's collective wisdom, we're sure to be able to solve it.
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