The Newsletter

Issue no. 55|11 October, 2011

Go Home

At our conferences, we ask everyone to introduce themselves in part by drawing a picture that represents their life. (Don't scoff - Mike and I did until we realized how effective this was.) LOTS of people draw tornados, or see-saws, or something crazy or out of control. They then tell us they're looking for "balance" between work and family.

There is none. No balance, ever. Everyone else is NOT doing it better than you, and you're NOT the only one feeling stressed and worried about everything, and feeling like you're almost failing at both.

That's right - there's no "balance." If you're trying to achieve balance, you're going to fail. Balance isn't the answer. I often share with them that the best they can hope for is "dynamic tension."

But, there IS a way to be at peace about the work and family struggle. (Because that's what folks seeking 'balance' secretly crave - to be at peace about it.)

Here's what to do: GO HOME. Stop trying to be make two things balance that ought NOT to be in "balance." These aren't two equals.... FAMILY IS MORE IMPORTANT.

So go home. Decide now, right now, that you are going to actually LIVE your life the way you SAY you want to. (Or hush about it).

Start planning your days so that you leave at 6 pm, say. Just go home. And when you're there... BE there. Sure, maybe a little email after the kids go to bed, but that's all.

We know senior SENIOR people who go home at 6. And spend time with their families. And when they're on vacation, they check in maybe once a day, but if they miss it, it's not the end of the world. yeah, if their boss calls, they answer. But they don't stay plugged in.

This is an important subject, so I'm going to send another note next time, continuing this thread.

But for now, trust me, you CAN go home.

Podcast Awards

We're proud to announce that Manager Tools has been nominated in the People's Choice category and both Manager Tools and Career Tools have been nominated in Business. Thank you to everyone who took the time to nominate us.

Voting starts tomorrow, 12 Oct and runs until 27 October. You can vote once each day at Since Career Tools won last year, we'd like you to vote for Manager Tools (but please vote for whom you please).

The awards are important to us, as they allow us to reach a wider audience and achieve our mission of changing management. We also know that many of you vote as a thank you for the podcasts and we are extremely grateful for that support. Thank YOU.

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